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should I have my husband exclude myself & our son from the relationship he has with one of his 2 daughers.

I am a Mother to our son who is 16 and a step mother to twin girls that r 17 who move from our/their home state in 2005. They lefted to returned back to there home a few days ago. One girls was her normals sweet kind self. The other one snuck out in the middle of the night to meet up w/some guy??? we were woken by her sister & then shortly after we had searched the house& lit the house up she returned, Her mom was called & my husband took her phone & itouch to prevent her from sneaking out or talking to any one other then her other family. There was a big blow up just before she left and she gave my husband a letter seconds before loading into restricted zone of the airport. Giving him a ultimatum. Also says that her itouch is destroyed, my husband thinks she broke the itouch to hide the info about email to the guy she tryed to go out & meet. Somehow I am being blaimed for the broken itouch & everything else in the world.

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Asked by Anonymous at 6:50 PM on Dec. 26, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (2)
  • Wow teenagers are handful, as you probably see. lol I don't think you should exclude your self and your son from their lives, because of the incident. The girl sounds like she just needs limits, teenagers rebel but they need limits and I think she just knows she can push the limits with you guys. If she plans on coming back have a long talk about how things are NOT going to happen like they did last time. Pushing teenagers away especially girls can cause emotional problems.

    Answer by Mommy2Be172009 at 11:00 PM on Dec. 27, 2008

  • She sounds like she is having a lot of adult issues she is handling - playing with adult issues - and is not ready to handle the consequences of that decision. What can you do? You can't be held responsible for her thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. So she lives with her mom? Well, that may be up to her mother at that point. If I were the dad I would continue to have contact with my ex, continue to try and reach out to my daughter by friendly phone calls, letters, or e-mails. In other words make myself available as a dad. That does not mean make myself pay for phones or other extras that would aid her in her poor decision making. She is growing up and she has to learn how to navigate in an adult world of sex, relationships (with peers, her parents, family, friends) and is going to possibly learn the hard way her actions have consequences.


    Answer by frogdawg at 11:14 PM on Dec. 27, 2008

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