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How do you handle the fact that your son/daughter cuts? Been told it is a release valve of sorts for their tension, but I find it totally disturbing to pick up bloody papertowls and see bloody scissors or knives. The psychologist says it is common in teens -- I don't know why.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:28 PM on Dec. 27, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (15)
  • i use to do it when i was young to it did help release stress it could also be a cry for help and they maybe going through something very common
    butterscotch297

    Answer by butterscotch297 at 3:30 PM on Dec. 27, 2008

  • My good friend did that in high school....she would either cut or get a lighter REALLY hot and put burn marks all over herself....I never understood why she really did it....She didnt have a bad life....I just think her mom didnt pay enough attention to her...Good luck though
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:32 PM on Dec. 27, 2008

  • I did it, for 6 years. And i still have the urge to. It's common but not normal. It is something to be worried about. And if that's all your psycologist says about it you should find another one. There are better ways to get rid of stress!! Don't let your kid think that your ok with it. Talk to him or her about it and see why their doing it. Instead of just going with it. Try and figure out why their doing it. Once you find out why, then you can figure out how to deal with it and the cutting should stop. If not, they may need to enter into an inpatient program.
    sarapurser

    Answer by sarapurser at 3:33 PM on Dec. 27, 2008

  • I think your child needs a new pscyhologist! It's common but NOT NORMAL like the previous poster stated.

    I did it as a way to release anger, frustration and depression. Normally there is an underlying issue, such as a major change recently, problems at school, sexual abuse, etc. Please get further help for your child.

    Love them and support them. Let them know they need help and that you will be there for them no matter what. But please don't be judgemental...it only makes it worse.

    I pray your child will find help and overcome this.
    MommaLucy

    Answer by MommaLucy at 3:41 PM on Dec. 27, 2008

  • yes it's common but like MommaLucy said, it should not be considered "normal behavior" I was a cutter, DH still is a cutter when he gets really stressed out.

    It's truly a call for help/attention. I know when I did it, it was a release but also a "look! I need help" kind of thing. I learned a new release though towards the end of teenage years. writing poetry and drawing. I even had my most off the wall poems published oddly enough even though I thought they were total crap, others really like them. People even bought my art work. Total shock to me! but it gave me that feeling of pride in what I was doing instead of shame over scars.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:48 PM on Dec. 27, 2008

  • I don't think it is anything normal at all. I never, nor do I know of anyone that ever did such a thing. I would be getting physciatric help for my child now if they ever did such a nasty thing.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:04 PM on Dec. 27, 2008

  • I don't understand why kids do it but then I do. I know I had a few adopted daughters do it and I learned that if I went all crazy like crying or scared in front of them...they did it more or showed it off....but then I learned to except what they did and brush it off, and told them it was stupid and that if they hurt themselves to where they had to go to the hospital I was not going to be there for them....in my case it worked and they stopped. I know there are deeper reasons and it's not something to brush off....We seeked help when needed and took care of the problem but I would say don't get worked up about it because the kids enjoy it. Again, I know it's more then what I know.
    stayhomemom22

    Answer by stayhomemom22 at 4:40 PM on Dec. 27, 2008

  • A very close friend of mine did that when she was younger. I didn't know her at the time because I didn't meet her until we were in 8th grade and she did that when she was in 5th grade I think she said but I don't bring it up. She told me at one time but I can't remember. She said she did it because she was really stressed but she took up horse riding and went to a phyciatrist and that helped her stop. I suggest getting your child into an after school activity and take them to a phyciatrist. I hope this helps. Good luck!!
    kate231004

    Answer by kate231004 at 9:23 PM on Dec. 27, 2008

  • I totally agree with mommylucy, it is definitely NOT normal. And I don't even know if your psychologist was right in telling you that it is common. I mean granted, I'm sure this is a lot more kids cutting today than what there was in the past years, but seriously, this isn't like some sort of sport all the teens are doing nowadays. You need to seek your child professional help with someone who isn't just going to brush it off and tell you its "common" And not to scare you but most kids/people who cut don't just do it to relieve stress from everyday hassles. There is usually a much bigger underlying problem that they cannot face, such as an eating disorder or some sort abuse.
    3LittleBearcubs

    Answer by 3LittleBearcubs at 9:30 AM on Dec. 28, 2008

  • I am a 31 yr old mom of 3, and I am a cutter. I started at age 11. I have noticed some kids around here do it for the attention. They don't take the time to clean up their mess, nor hide it. They are normally referred to as EMO. I have always done it for stress relief. It becomes an addiction after doing it for so long. Let that psychologist know it is not only teens. I wrote a journal about that recently. Tell your son if he is going to do it he has to be responsible with it. He has to clean up his mess, and keep what he is cutting with sterile, let alone keeping his wounds clean and clear of infection.
    ColleenF30

    Answer by ColleenF30 at 11:34 AM on Dec. 28, 2008

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