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Is being a step mom really hard?

I am dating a guy for about 1 1/2 years and his daughter and ex is gave me all kinds of trouble. The daughter always tells her dad, he rather be with me than her. The ex has even went to court to ask the court to order him to break up with me. She is re-married with 4 other children. I need help!!!!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:01 PM on Dec. 28, 2008 in General Parenting

Answers (3)
  • Being a step mom isn't easy no matter how nice the ex or the kids are. There are so many levels to it. I love my step children but if I had to do it all over again...I would have run like hell! But in all honesty, I'm in it for the long haul because I love and care for them very much.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:23 PM on Dec. 28, 2008

  • I really have not found it to be that hard. I have respect for my husband's ex wife. I stay out of the major decision making when it comes to my step son. Any and all major decisions are between my husband and his ex wife. I have spent quite a bit of time with my husband's ex and have opened our home to her. She knows that I love her son just as I love my own children. Now as a mom whose children have had a step mom these are the things that irritate me: Thinking that you know my children better than I do, thinking that what my ex and I discuss regarding our children is your business and that you have a say so in major decisions and telling my children that you love them when you hardly know them.
    Magpie75

    Answer by Magpie75 at 1:47 AM on Dec. 29, 2008

  • It can be hard but, if the grown ups respect each other then it won't be hard. It doesn't sound like she respects you and she is allowing her daughter not to respect you so, in your situation its most likely going to be hard. I make all the decisions about my stepson because his mother died after going on a drug binge and his dad works. Some mothers don't want you to have anything to do with the decisions regarding "their" child and some welcome your input. I have no experience about working with a SM so, I don't have any advice.
    matthewscandi

    Answer by matthewscandi at 11:45 AM on Dec. 29, 2008

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