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Three year old NEED HELP!

My three year old just started crying every time she needs something and if she dont get her way boy the water works start up. Another thing she does is act like a perfect angel at somone elses house but when she is home, it takes everthing I got to not go lock myself in my bed room. Any advice?

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Asked by lakotajean at 11:14 PM on Dec. 28, 2008 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 3 (27 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • Is there a new baby around her? If so it could be that she is just acting like the baby does to get what she wants. When I worked daycare I saw that alot, even a new baby who isn't living with you, a friends baby, cousin, baby at daycare. As for acting like an angel with others and "terrible" for you, when that stops I'll let ya all know, my 15 yr old still does that and his friends parents still complain about their teens doing the same thing!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:19 PM on Dec. 28, 2008

  • There is other children around her not sisters or brothers. she is the only child. My babysitter only watches Lakota and a baby that is stil only months old. Could it be that she is just begging for attention? How do I make her stop this ?

    Answer by lakotajean at 11:26 PM on Dec. 28, 2008

  • Is it possible that she acts like that because she's discovered you'll give in if she does? My three year old tries it on occasion, but I tell her that I need her to stop and to talk to me like a big girl so I can understand her.

    Answer by Happywith2girls at 11:38 PM on Dec. 28, 2008

  • I wish I had some advice for you...but all I can say is that you are not alone. I have a 4 year old son that does the same thing. I have started to put him in the corner till he calms down and we can talk about why he is upset. There is this thing that his head start group calls the turtle...when they are getting upset or angry...they "go into there shell" ( take a minute by themselves) think about why they are mad, calm down then they come out of there shell calm and talk about it. Some times it works and sometimes it doesn't.

    Answer by shiningstar75 at 11:42 PM on Dec. 28, 2008

  • Welcome to 3. Your daughter is completely normal. Most children act better with other adults then they do at home. They know the boundaries at home and what they can get away with. The best advice I can give you is 1) Pick your battles. If it's something that doesn't really matter, won't affect her health or safety then try to give in a little. 2) Stand your ground when it counts. If you've said No then stand your ground no matter how long the fit last. If you give in the only thing she learns is how long she has to cry. If you can't take it then tell her she's allowd to be upset but not infront of you and then find a safe place for her to sit out the temper tatrum. The rule at our house is until you can count to 10 without crying you have to stay in your room. Not only will your daughter learn limitations and how to calm herself down, she's learning how to count too!

    Answer by maddysmomma at 12:12 AM on Dec. 29, 2008

  • She know eventually you'll give in and she to embarassed to do it else where . I say try to channel that anger before it get to far calm her down . We taught our daughter breathing techniques. Once a lil kids gets started they can't stop. So talk to her try to understand why she has to cry to get the attention or reaction she getting from her behavior.And if that the attention she wants from you. And No means No matter how much she cries

    Answer by hallehazel at 12:16 AM on Dec. 29, 2008

  • Yes this is just the 3 year old world of parenting! My daughter does the same thing. I used to give in because she would get bad but now I pull up a chair and tell her to sit in time out and once she can stop crying and talk like a big girl she can then come out. The first time I did this it was hard but i kept doing this everytime and it works pretty good now. But at night because of her being tired it does not work as well i just walk away and she seems to calm down in almost minutes because she knows i am not going to listen to her until she can talk like a big girl.

    Answer by Angela1436 at 8:31 AM on Dec. 29, 2008

  • As others said, I think tired and over-stimulated is a toxic combo. I avoid this by putting my girl in bed as early as possible and keeping the school week low key. On Sunday, we switch to low key activities in preparation for the week.

    When she starts acting out, I cut our activities back to minimize the stimulation. Honestly (and despite what relatives may say), nothing has worked better than sending her to her room to calm down, putting her in bed early, and sticking to what I say. I also found that she actually WAS listening when I talked to her about taking deep breaths to calm down and listening on the first time without the drama. I've seen her take deep breaths to try to calm down, and point out to me that she is listening on the first time. Then I make a big deal out of her good behavior! And when she’s at her worst, I try to remember to tell her that I love her no matter what.

    Answer by B.Wright at 11:18 AM on Dec. 29, 2008

  • Sounds like my 3 year old. Try to think of it this way. At least you know she will be good for somone else to watch if you need a break. It is always easier to know that your friends don't mind watching your kid when you need the help instead of feeling like you are burdening them.

    Answer by Mandy5405 at 4:56 PM on Dec. 29, 2008

  • lol, am i mean? i tell my son to knock it off and give him the mommy mean face. then it's time out for 5 minitues. if he keeps on then it's up to bed for a nap.... 30 min. minimum. i did this for my nephew and it really helped. my son hardly ever whines/cries though so i only needed to do it 2 times with him

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 11:36 PM on Dec. 29, 2008

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