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So I'm watching this show on sex and teens.

It says the Netherlands teen pregnancy rate is 90% lower than the US.

The parents allow and expect their kids to have sex. Some even facilitate the sex if it is monogamous. The parents buy condoms for their kids. Sex is a no Shane, non private subject in the household. What do you think?

Answer Question
 
Musicmom80

Asked by Musicmom80 at 12:32 AM on Aug. 30, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 36 (80,428 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • Most of Europe can differentiate between naked and sex. The US cannot. That is the biggest problem we here in the US face. It goes back to our Puritan roots.
    Rosehawk

    Answer by Rosehawk at 12:40 AM on Aug. 30, 2011

  • I think they just introduce it as a part of life. Not. Demon,
    Musicmom80

    Comment by Musicmom80 (original poster) at 12:45 AM on Aug. 30, 2011

  • I think part of our problem is that sex is a nasty thing here. I was talking with a friend about it. She said that she was reading a book (can't remember what it was off the top of my head) about the subject; our repressed idea of sex is part of the reason why our sexual crimes rate is so high. Other countries don't have rape statistics near the rate of ours. We teach kids that sex is bad. Sex is dirty, it's nasty, and you shouldn't be having it. But that's not true. How do they think any of us got here?! Even the Bible says sex is a good thing. What do we think "go forth and multiply" means? Can't multiply without having sex. Well, you can NOW, but not back then. :P
    GlowWorm889

    Answer by GlowWorm889 at 12:54 AM on Aug. 30, 2011

  • See---they use CONTRACEPTIVES!!!! Birth control! They are not a bunch of dumb teens who think they won't get pregnant if they do it standing up or if they use a pop bottle douche or if its the third quarter of the moon's phase...etc. Duhhhh. They are smart in the Netherlands. Sex is just fine IF people know how to prevent pregnancy> I swear the USA has more illiterate and ignorant teens than anywhere else in the civilized world.
    minnesotanice

    Answer by minnesotanice at 1:00 AM on Aug. 30, 2011

  • Like with most things, finding the middle ground is often the best route...(( Im not sure Id facilitate sex for my teens!!!!) But here in the US it seems we often have two extremes: 1. sex is a nasty, forbidden subject and you are a whore if you even mention it or 2. there are no parental guidelines or control whatsoever and kids are experimenting without any knowledge or guidance at a very early age. Either scenario leaves kids open for misunderstandings and being unprepared for the hormones and peer pressure of sex
    Nimue930

    Answer by Nimue930 at 1:03 AM on Aug. 30, 2011

  • My 13 yr old stepdaughter has her first bf for the past 4 months and I have talked to her about abstinence and safe sex. I want her to know that sex can be wonderful in a committed relationship where both partners are emotionally ready. She knows that once she loses her virginity she can't get it back. So far she is still a virgin but she knows she can come to me for protection when and if she needs it. I would hope that she's 16 or older when that time comes, but if it happens before that I want her to be emotionally ready and protected. And yes I would definitely buy condoms for her.
    SherrieMomof2

    Answer by SherrieMomof2 at 7:42 AM on Aug. 30, 2011

  • I'm European and I agree with the more relaxed attitude towards sex.    They also have a more relaxed attitude towards alcohol  and far less problems with public drunkenness and alcoholism. 


     

    beeky

    Answer by beeky at 7:55 AM on Aug. 30, 2011

  • Ok, I'm going to step out here and admit to being the mom who has encouraged my girls to WAIT until marriage before having sex. My oldest daughter married last year and waited for her husband before having sex. My other two daughters 20 & 18 are both still virgins. My platform for purity was explaining to them how a "condom" does NOT protect you from a torn reputation, or heartstrings that will carry on into your adult life. You won't miss what you've never had, was a way to encourage them how people can compare penis size, breast size, and how most women wish they would have waited for their husbands. You can never get your virginity back, but what a wonderful gift they can experience when they marry, knowing no other man has ever looked upon their bodies or touched them. They too have witnessed turmoil their friends have gone through from having sex before marriage. Something a condom will never protect them from.
    momma-t42

    Answer by momma-t42 at 9:50 AM on Aug. 30, 2011

  • I think it sounds like it's working for them.
    cleanaturalady

    Answer by cleanaturalady at 9:56 AM on Aug. 30, 2011

  • I tend to agree, (although I wouldn't facilitate sex for my boys). I just don't think it should be treated as taboo. It's important to talk about and treat as a natural part of life. My boys know the risks emotionally and physically. Of course I've expressed I'd like them to wait until their married, but I'm not going to make them feel horrible in the event they want to or they are thinking about it. I still have a 17 yr old virgin and its not because I preach abstinence it's because we can talk very openly about it.

    It's the same with alcohol. My oldest son was in Europe two years ago, and said that its legal to drink and he thinks its better because people aren't waiting until they 21 to go all out and get wasted. They don't see it as some big rite of passage, its just normal.
    blessedwboysx3

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 2:58 PM on Aug. 30, 2011

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