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Will my daughter feel abandon by me?

I have a 23 month old daughter who I have always stayed home with. She has only been watched 4 times and that was in the last 3 months, she stayed with grandparents for about 4-5 hours and did fine. Well, before I had her I worked at a local restaurant for 6 years on and off and I just talked to them about going back once a week or once every 2 weeks for a 4-6 hour shift. Now I feel so guilty and like I shouldnt be leaving her even for those few hours. Do you think she will be okay? Can anyone give me some advice or anything to help me feel better about it or should I just call them back? I mean, shes 2 yo and I think she would be okay for a few hours a week, but when I think of it as like 20 hours a month or so that sounds horrible to me.


Asked by asholan_07 at 2:29 PM on Dec. 29, 2008 in General Parenting

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Answers (5)
  • Oh mamma! You'll be fine! i was going through the same thing when my daughter was 13 months!
    I only worked 4 hours 3 days a week and my mom watched her and by the time I got out of work she would drop her off with me while she was going to work. it was perfect!
    And when I went to work, I was so busy that just the act of interacting with people was theraputic and I got to be Lisa not just mamma Lisa.
    And My DD was fine! She barely knew I was gone! lol Your baby will probably have so much fun interacting with grandma n grandpa and this will give you some space too!

    Answer by Adja70 at 3:05 PM on Dec. 29, 2008

  • You may feel horrible about it because you are used to always being there with her, but it is not such a bad thing for you to return to work. She will be okay. There are tons of moms who sacrafice a few hours a day to make the money they need to provide for thier family. There are moms who sacrafice months and years to do what they need to do to make a better life for themselves inorder to give thier children a chance to have a good life. I have a huge attatchment to my son just like you with your daughter, and just like you, I feel a little apprehensive about leaving him. On the other hand I am going back into the military inorder to better my son's life. So it is okay to feel that way, I say go for it! Good luck! All the power to ya mommy!

    Answer by PhlyLuvzOwain at 3:00 PM on Dec. 29, 2008

  • I'm assuming that since you are only going back for one shift a week, its mostly about getting a break and not the money. I see nothing wrong with it...your daughter will be fine...its normal and HEALTHY to get a break from your child.....4-6 hours per week is not going to harm your daughter.

    Answer by MommaLucy at 3:00 PM on Dec. 29, 2008

  • She probably won't even notice you're gone if she is staying with family. Pretty soon it will be just part of the routine. I mean, my husband works 8 hours a day and I don't think our kids feel abandoned by him. They just know he has to work and will be home eventually (if he isn't working a double...then he doesn't come home until they are in bed and he leaves long before we wake up).

    Answer by justanotherjen at 3:31 PM on Dec. 29, 2008

  • She will do fine and be well. All moms go through this, and then one day you notice her life is full of fun and friends at her place of daycare or with her provider. You will find you enjoy your job and the time you work. Just always check up on who cares for her. Don't feel guilty as, it gets easier and better as time goes on.


    Answer by Teachermom01 at 3:38 PM on Dec. 29, 2008