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Should I have my ds stay the night with me in the hospital when I give birth?

My ds has always been very attached to me. No one has ever taken him even for a couple hours because he screams if I even leave the room and he's not with me. He won't let anyone hold him. He's 16 months old nowand he'll be 22 months old when I give birth. I know if I leave him with his dad for the night or anyone else he'll scream and won't go to sleep. Is there anyway that I can just keep him in the room with me, or what else can I do? I was thinking of him staying the night with me in the hospital? What should I do?

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Asked by babygirl9304627 at 8:58 AM on Dec. 30, 2008 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (10)
  • i would start gettin him prepared. leave him for a half hour by himself with daddy or whoever would keep him while you were in the hospital. when he gets used to that then move it to an hour. when he starts realizing mommy is always coming back maybe that will make it easier but i would not take him with you your going to be going through enough.

    Answer by jodi205 at 9:04 AM on Dec. 30, 2008

  • i agree with jodi start now and get him prepared. thats not good for your son period to not be able to stay with someone else. what if you had an emergency? then your son wouldn't know what to do. he needs to learn that when you leave, you will return. sure he might cry at first but he will adjust. i absolutely would not take him to the hospital with you!! you've given birth once so you know how tiring it will be imagine just giving birth and having to take care of your almost two year old also. that would be miserable!! lol but really start now preparing your son. because it isn't good for him to be like that. :)

    Answer by krazyash023 at 9:09 AM on Dec. 30, 2008

  • Uh oh, I don't think the hospital will allow him to stay in the hospital with you.
    You will need to train him slowly at this time to start staying with someone else, preferably the person you choose while you are in the hospital, so he can get used to them. You can do this by going with him and having a visit with your friend and have your son play with his toys. Start having him play with his toys or watching tv in another room while you visit with your friend. Eventually, leave for a little while until he adjusts to being there without you. As he gets used to it, spend longer periods of time away. Then try a night or two overnight visits with your son being at your friend's house so he gets used to that before you have the baby.
    Hope it works out!

    Answer by PrydferthMenyw at 10:55 AM on Dec. 30, 2008

  • I dont think so. I think its better if he dosent for both you the new baby and him. Just prepare him and explain to him whats going on. He may get upset but in the end it will be best for all of you. I am sure its not going to be easy and good luck to you. Start preping him now!!

    Answer by Mother2oneboy at 12:33 PM on Dec. 30, 2008

  • They won't let you do that. Its time to get him accustomed to you not being available every second.

    Answer by momofsaee at 12:38 PM on Dec. 30, 2008

  • Your mind will be on other things than caring for your son while you are in the hospital having your baby and recovering from childbirth. They won't have anyone there to babysit or help, and I'd be very surprised if they'd even permit young (non-patient) children to stay, even if just because of possible spread of germs. You'll miss him, for sure, but you will all soon be re-united. So now is the time to work on getting him used to staying with someone else. As Jodi mentioned, leave for a short time, be matter-of-fact about it- no drama, no prolonged hugs and so forth, and when you come back in smile and say here I am! And increase the time until it is a couple hours. Even if there are still tears, he will understand that when Mom leaves she does come back.

    Answer by Bmat at 1:02 PM on Dec. 30, 2008

  • I wouldn't, he needs to start getting him prepared. I know the hospital I delivered at doesn't allow kids to stay the night. Mom needs rest and with a toddler it is hard.

    Answer by PoisonousBlonde at 1:12 PM on Dec. 30, 2008

  • I would think the experience of being in the hospital and seeing Mom in a hospital room, hooked up to machines, etc might be more traumatizing than staying with a friend or loved one in the comfort of home.

    Plus, you will have all you can handle, you don't need the additional stress of having to worry about him.

    I agree with others, let him get used to the idea that Mommy goes away for a short time but always comes back. Even if you start with baby steps and just leave the room he is in for brief periods. My daughter went through separation anxiety and I enrolled her in Mother's Day Out. Now she RUNS to her classroom, she won't even say bye to me. LOL So you see, they DO get over it. ;)

    Answer by sariejack at 2:28 PM on Dec. 30, 2008

  • At the hospital I would be delievering at they allow family members to stay. My friend had her toddler stay with her when she delivered her baby, I dont know how she did it, I knew she had to be sore and exhausted, but thats why I was asking! Thanks for the advice!!

    Answer by babygirl9304627 at 9:29 PM on Dec. 30, 2008

  • Leave him with his dad for an hour, the next time 2 on an so forth. Let him know he will be staying with someone the nights you are in the hospital. Even have him stay the night with someone a couple nights before you go to the hospital. This way he will know that you will always come back to get him. It will be hard, but let him cry when you leave and make it quick.....the more you baby him and go back to him before leaving the worse it is on him and you. I know it's hard, but it has to be done. Besides, if you have an emergency come up and you HAVE to leave him with someone, he will need to be prepared and know that it is ok and you will always come back. Besides, if he won't let anyone else hold him, and he is at the hospital with you, and you are trying to can't tend to him and give birth at the same time.

    Answer by MomOf2Js2 at 12:17 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

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