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God, help me if my son marries her or gets her pregnant...

So for the last couple of months my 18 year old son has talked non stop about his new girlfriend... Even going as far to say he thinks she is the one ( NOT normal at all for him ) ...

Well he brought her over yesterday and I about had a heart attack... I already know her because she had worked at the nursing home that i work at...

She makes me sick for several reasons ... and I PRAY he gets far far far from her.

When she worked for a short time with me, she was so lazy, didnt do anything except whine and then just stopped showing up... I also had several conversations with her and was told by her ( in a bragging way ) that she was "seeing" 3 different guys and she had no idea who her daughters father was... This same daughter ( who is now 4) - my son didnt know about until I told him that she was indeed a mother ( the father got custody because she left her home alone while she " just went to the store to get some ciggs" ...)

Also to meet her boyfriends mother " for the first time" she showed up in a see-through fishnet shirt to where I could see her bra, and the HUGE tattoo of some guys name on her back ....

I think my son must of been hit in the head or something....

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:02 PM on Sep. 7, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Answers (7)
  • Our sons do what they want to, we can only raise them the best we can and hope for the best. I have two older sons. One is 18 one is 19. My 18 yr old has the sweetest gf in the world, a bit misguided and sometimes immature but she is 16 (almost 17) so basically what one might expect for the age. Now my 19 yr old? OMG! I have had to deal with one mom who was on drug and did crack with her 8 month old child in the house while the father was in prison. My son came to me to ask what he should do. She ended up stealing everything from him and he came home from work to find her in bed with another man. His last fiancee gave him crabs. I told him, he sure knows how to pick them.

    Answer by gemgem at 5:06 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • oh gemgem, don't say that. I have two boys and I am terrified about what/who they may bring home one day :(

    Answer by matthewscandi at 5:16 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • well we cant help who our kids love and if you nag to much about er it ight draw him away .i know this 1st hand from my mom she hated my ex so much and all she did was complain about him and i hated it .but now i can look back and say she was right .this is one of them things where you kinda have to let him make his own mistakes or choices ur his mom and always will be .you can give him ur feedback on her but dont over kill it

    Answer by britme1027 at 5:17 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • I am sorry---
    My son married a woman who was a complete liar ---she worked hard, looked good, had a talent for making people feel that she was amazing and perfect but I and a few others knew she was a liar and would be unfaithful. But I didn't say anything. I mean, what CAN you say? So, after they were married 4 years,my son started finding out that she HAD been lying and cheating on him. ( some of us think she is a nymphomaniac )
    She made him think he was going crazy and he even went to see a therapist--the whole thing.He thought he was wrong. Well....eventually, the truth came out and they were divorced.
    I really think IT IS THE SEX!!! I'm not kidding. Perfectly nice guys will be hypnotized by great sex. It makes me sick.
    I hope your son won't marry her. Good luck.

    Answer by minnesotanice at 5:23 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • I will agree...I would tell me son to run! As mothers we want whats best for our kids.

    Answer by bellamommyof4 at 7:35 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • oh damn

    Answer by jostock at 9:19 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • It is a dilemma. You certainly don't want to push him further in her arms. I have a rule in my house that says you can't even discuss marriage until you having been dating a year. Start to tell him that, yes she may be the one, however, you need to date for a year before you even think about it. This way you get to see how your feeling develop as marriage is a serious committment. Feelings are sometimes stronger in the beginning. But, if it is meant to be those feelings will still be as strong or should be stronger in a year. Then during this year you can be supportive, but show examples, of how things are different between her family and yours. After all, kids would be raised with her values as well. Trust in your influence. Good Luck.

    Answer by moneymagnetmom at 2:55 PM on Sep. 8, 2011

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