Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

7 Bumps

Is it cruel to make a tween wear Ugly clothes to school as a punishment?

Such a sweater with a great big duck in the middle of it for your 13 old getting detention in class?? My husbands parents did this to him when he was child and think its funny

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:34 PM on Sep. 7, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Answers (27)
  • I find that abusive..public humiliation is suppose to accomplish what?

    Answer by BigMomm4 at 9:35 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • I think it would be.

    Answer by Noni2319 at 9:35 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • I would say yes. That could cause her to be ridiculed, and really I think that you would be using other children to punish your child. It seems childish and cruel.

    Answer by LadyIlanaWolfe at 9:36 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • Yes. You're just setting your kid up to be picked on by others.

    Answer by Christine0813 at 9:36 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • exactly, bigmomm4! the consequences are not logical.

    Answer by mommy_wambles at 9:36 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • Yes, I think that would be absolutely horrible. I firmly believe discipline isn't something you should announce to your child's peers.

    Answer by Brawnwyn at 9:37 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • Yes, I do,, because she will suffer at the hands of others,, if she got detention just ground her for goodness sakes, don't humiliate her,, I had a friend in junior high who had a bed wetting problem, his mother hung the sheets out of his window (facing the front yard) every time he did it. I will tell you that everyone was horribly cruel to him, and I will also tell you he hasn't spoken to his mother in almost 20 years.

    Answer by kimigogo at 9:37 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • As "punishment' then, absolutly!! Why intentional cause you child to have perhaps what could turn into long term permanent issues? All it takes it ONE day and a kid is known for the rest of his school life as the one who wore this or did that..How inmature and cruel of parents to resort to such behavior. i understand children must learn there are consequences to their bad actions, and it breaks my heart to already punish, but to inflict emotional harm?!? No way! Grounding or time out is good enough punishment, but forcing your child to "think about what they did" as they're being picked on and laughed at is only adding to the problem, not punishing and being done with it. Good luck to whoever does this or is contemplating it, then please don't.

    Answer by Jeda624 at 9:40 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • I agree that the consequences aren't logical. If your tween or teen refuses to put their laundry in the hamper and doesn't have clean or ironed clothes...then I might make them wear something from the floor, but I think the consequences should have something to do with the infraction. And consequences shouldn't be part of some cruel amusement for the parents, they should be something that teaches the child why their behavior is inappropriate.

    Humiliation is a terrible form of punishment.

    Answer by ohwrite at 9:40 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

  • I find it inappropriate. Punishments are not for the amusement of others. It is to reach and teach. Humiliation, what does that teach? How does that reach a person? Allienate. But not reach.


    Answer by frogdawg at 9:42 PM on Sep. 7, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.