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Husband wants sex ALL the this normal?

My husband and I have been married for 15 years now. When we first got married, we argued a lot about sex. I was in college, had two jobs, and was tired a lot of the time when I got home. We decided back then that we would be intimate every other day. I know, I know...people say not to schedule it, but it worked for us. All of a sudden, my husband has decided that he doesn't want the "scheduled intimacy" and wants "spontaniety." And I quote, "Sometimes I want it every day, don't you?" Well, no. Sometimes I like to spend quality time together void of sex - like watching a movie on the couch or just talking. When he doesn't get sex when he wants it, he gives me the cold treatment. It actually pushes me further away. I am SOOOOOO tired of arguing about this. Is my husband normal? I'm going crazy.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:51 AM on Dec. 31, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (15)
  • My BF of 7 yrs wants it everyday!!! it is normal lol...i can't keep up with the guy..

    Answer by kaylajean86 at 9:02 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • girl thats your husband give it up. be glad he still wants to do it so much after 15 years. i agree that there should be time spene together, like movies and other things. but you cant expect him to have a scheduled sex life and be okay with it. also just because he said sometimes he wants it everyday does not mean that you guys will be doing it everyday.

    Answer by NATTY567 at 9:04 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • When my SO and I met he told me he wanted as much sex as he could get before he couldn't have it anymore. I think many men fear the day when their phallus no longer works and they over compensate by having it so often. Your feelings about it matter so I'm not saying give in to him all the time but try to compromise. Maybe every weekend day then every other day during the week or something like that.

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:05 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Well my hubby must not be normal, he works away so you think the few days he is home he would want it. NO WAY!! If he is home for a solid week then 2-3 time is enough for him, and we are TTC. You are LUCKY in my eyes.....I want it ALL THE TIME.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:42 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Makes you wonder why he married you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:46 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • My ex used to do this to me too. I don't think men realize that you, unlike them, are not a light switch. A woman needs to work up to being aroused, loving touches through out the day, a little sweet talk etc ...not the ass grabbing or nipple tweaking they consider foreplay. Then when you add in the way he acts all butt hurt when you are just-not-in the-mood-right-now, it actually turns you off to him even more. Talking to my ex and explaining how a women works helped for a little while. But not all that much obviously, as he is my EX now. Well, I guess I'm not much help am I?
    I do sympathize with you, however, and I don't think just because you are married you have to give it to him every time he feels like it.

    Answer by MomShawn70 at 10:07 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • It may be normal for him. Some men simply have a higher sex drive than do others. Also, for many men, sex is the only way they know to receive and/or express love. That's because they haven't been taught any differently. Try to look at it positively--he isn't desiring some other woman. It's you whom he wants. If you stop protesting, he just might cool off a little bit.

    Answer by NannyB. at 10:21 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I think its normal. BUT he needs to compramise with you. You're not always going to be in the mood and he needs to accept that. Its wrong to give your spouse the cold shoulder for rejection of sex. You cant always get what you want when you want it.

    Answer by LovinEveryDay at 10:22 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • If he thinks he can get it everyday if he wants it, maybe he'll chill a bit and be more relaxed. It isn't fair if you really object, if you are uncomfortable. Perhaps it would help if he would be more affectionate other times. So you don't feel as if you are a convenience. Perhaps if you would cuddle up to him as much as you can it might help you get in the mood better.

    Answer by Bmat at 11:03 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • You'd better find a way to satisfy him girl or he'll find someone that will. Just stating the facts.

    Answer by dinkerstory at 11:16 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

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