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HOW DO YOU HANDLE CHURCH MEMBERS THAT ARE BOSSY AND TAKE CHARGE?

I WAS A MEMBER OF OUR WOMEN'S MINISTRYAT OUR BAPTIST CHURCH IN CHARLOTTE ,NC. THE PRESIDENT IS A VERY ENTHUSIATIC AND TAKE CHARGE PERSON, HOWEVER, SHE DOESN'T REALLY HAVE LEADERSHIP SKILLS MUCH TO EVERYONE'S SURPRISE. OUR FELLOWSHIP MEETINGS ON SATURDAYS HAVE DWINDLED OUT. NONE OF THE CHUCH LADIES COME ANYMORE. WE THINK IT IS BECAUSE SHE SHUNS ALL OF THE OTHER MEMBERS IDEAS AND STICKS TO HER OWN. I HAVE DECIDED TO LEAVE THE COMMITTEE, AND SHE REFUSES TO ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I REALLY DON'T WANT TO HURT HER FEELINGS, BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE APART OF THIS COMMITEE BECAUSE IT IS STARTING TO BE JUST ABOUT HER EGO. THE OTHER MEMBERS SEEM TO AGREE, BUT NO ONE HAS STEPPED UP TO CONFRONT HER. SHOULD I SAY SOMETHING?

 
controlfreak3

Asked by controlfreak3 at 9:49 AM on Dec. 31, 2008 in Religion & Beliefs

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This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • i say to pray about it. are close to her at all? if you feel you have the words to say and the right attitude to say it, do it. we are to hold each other accountable in our actions. its hard to say. just pray and give God control of the situation, and ask Him to work it out and show you what you need to do. then have faith to know that He heard you, and that He is working it out. if you feel like you need to remove yourself from the situation and resign, tell her again. if she still refuses, tell her you cannot accept "no" from her as an answer. she obviously does have respect for others issues or she wouldnt do that to you. if she wont accept, tell her you will have to talk to the pastor, or whoever is in charge of the groups, and consult them.
    ivelostmyself

    Answer by ivelostmyself at 1:12 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Try starting one outside of church... I'm sure she'll catch wind and figure things out for herself
    dtetz

    Answer by dtetz at 9:58 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Is their anybody in the church, That has authority to talk to her? That might be a better influence on her to change? Maybe the minister

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 9:58 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • First problem- it's a baptist church in the south, and you're expecting anything better than this type of behavior? lol

    I would just drop out of it. Saying something is only going to rile up her cohorts and get people pissed at you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:09 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Maybe you can talk to her outside of the church... explain to her why you and many others feel the way you do... if that doesn't work see if there is someone (like the pastor or the pastor's wife) whom can talk to her...
    gmasboy

    Answer by gmasboy at 10:20 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I think you all should sit down and tell her. Try taking some time out of the day for you and the ladys that left, to sit down and discuss what you belief needs to change in order to keep a majority of you all happy and the committee alive. Present them to her in a nice fashion. If she still wont' gave, i would speak to the pastor.
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 1:30 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Before you leave and/or start something different I would first pray about it. Also, I might suggest you and another person from the committee or group who has already left go to your pastor's wife (if that is who the Women's Preisent answers to) and explain why people are leaving or wanting to leave and/or no longer participate. But first of all pray first so that the right words will be said without causing hurt.
    bonn777

    Answer by bonn777 at 1:58 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Tell her the absolute truth about why you are leaving her committee and tell her why you think the numbers have dwindled. The Bible says that we are to speak the truth in love, so choose your words wisely and tell her the truth. Ask God to help you and He will do it.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 3:06 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I think it's funny the that question is posted by someone named "controlfreak"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:45 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Tell them to go to Hell! lol
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:51 PM on Dec. 31, 2008