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How do you deal with step daughters who try to stir things up to make your holiday gathering unleasant?

My husband and I decided to start a christmas celebration with our children the week-end before christmas. We also decided not to buy for the adult children and told them not to buy for us. We have a lot of grand-children and step-grandchildren now. Apparently this upset my stepdaughters but they did not say anything to me. I heard about it from my 5 yr. old step grand-daughter while visiting at their home. Also, the younger daughter was rude to her father on the phone and said they didn't need to come because it "was just for kids anyway". I guess I was raised differently and I wouldn't expect my parents to keep buying for me when I was 30 or older. Buying for the children would be fine. This set the mood for the gathering. The youngest stepdaughter arrived and all I heard was "tell my brother to get out there and shovel that _______ driveway, I almost fell. How do I deal with this?


Asked by Caregiver820 at 10:08 AM on Dec. 31, 2008 in General Parenting

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Answers (4)
  • Let your hubby handle it. Sounds like they are being babies. Christmas is not about children, it's about Jesus and everyone coming together and celebrate. The gifts are just a bonus.


    Answer by Christine0813 at 10:15 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • She kind of sounds like a 5 year old throwing a tantrum. The economy is rough and I think most families (especially larger ones) are cutting down on gifts this year.

    Answer by sbastille at 10:28 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I told my Dad that he should just worry about buying for the kids this year and that I didn't need anything. He gave me money which I wasn't expecting but it wouldn't have bothered me if he hadn't gotten me anything For me, just having everyone together is enough.

    Answer by Jan40 at 10:38 AM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Money is tight everywhere! And for grown children to not understand this is childish. My parents bought for my children and got a little something for us, we buy them a gift from the children! Now my MIL expects a large gift from us, I guess it's just personal perspective. I truly don't care about the gifts, I just want to enjoy my family. :o)


    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 11:17 AM on Dec. 31, 2008