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3 Bumps

*****UPDATE*****Neighbor question

I went over last night and talked to the daughter that speaks English and I can understand and she tried to turn it around and say that I was the one saying things and wouldn't let me get a word in edgewise so I think it is just a family that thinks if you don't kiss their butts then you are no good.  I tried apologizing and she kept repeating herself about things and saying that I said this and that about the music they had playing and then that I made some comment about what her dad was eating and about someone elses hat that they had on.  Which I would never make comments about anything of anyone elses.  I just don't understand why they are saying this and being this way.  And she kept interrupting me when I was trying to talk which I didn't do with her.

This may get long sorry will try to explain as well as possible

My next door neighbor had a birthday party for their granddaughter a couple weeks ago, well they had asked my 4 year old but didn't say anything to me about it so the say of I took a birthday card over to her and wasn't planning on staying but the mother of the child that turned a year asked me to stay so we did.

Well my 4 year old kept saying things about wanting to play with the Spanish kid and different things but kept saying the word Spanish over and over when referring to them. I told him not to say that and to be quiet but you know 4 years old they say what is on their minds.

So we stayed for a little while because I tried to bring my child home and he just kept going back over there; but was feeling a little out of place because they kept talking in Spanish and I don't speak Spanish at all. Well we were there for about an hour and one of the sons came over and starting reaming me out about that not everyone is Spanish and that we need to watch what we were saying(when it was a 4 year old saying this).

So I told my son to come home but he wanted to play the games and break the pinta' so I said fine. But since this time the have been offish and not very friendly to me. I have apologized to them but it doesn't seem to help. I was wondering what you would do or if you would just let it go.

The daughter was out talking to one of the other neighbors and my oldest is having a fund raiser for school so we were out walking so just out of common curiosity we said hello to her and her husband and they all but ignored us just stared at us(the daughter used to talk to me more up until this incident).

I hate having or feeling like people are mad at me for some reason and don't know what to do about this. It wasn't even me that was saying anything it was my 4 year old. Have you ever had this happen to you and if so what did you do?


Asked by Christmaslver68 at 1:47 PM on Sep. 12, 2011 in Relationships

Level 47 (254,089 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • HOLY HELL!! I can not stand it when people act like that. I would have taken it more as the language and not ethnicity............. I wouldn't worry too much about it. They are probably A**holes and you wouldn't want to be friends anyways!! LOL!

    Answer by eluc at 4:51 PM on Sep. 12, 2011

  • Really? Well I am Spanish myself and would not have been offended so?

    Answer by gemgem at 1:55 PM on Sep. 12, 2011

  • kids say the darndest things whatcha gunna do.....its not that serious we are hispanic and would not have been offended by this but maybe there is somethings else going on....

    Answer by rebecca2012 at 2:05 PM on Sep. 12, 2011

  • Nothing like that exactly, but I have had problems like that within our own family believe it or not. There is not much you can do to control how others feel or what they act like. You apologized and that is all that you could do. My fil is a known liar and told one of my dh's cousins that we had said something about them...we never did. When I found out I explained fil is a known liar and honestly they should have come to me and asked me if I had said or done what he claimed. I apologized for what he did, and they still wont talk to me. I dont sweat it, and neither should you.

    Answer by gemgem at 1:50 PM on Sep. 12, 2011

  • There is nothing you can do to fix this. You apologized. Those folks really should understand that kids say these things. I have to say, however, you really need to nip it inthe bud when your little one says things like this; it's much like a racial slur - if he was running around saying the 'n' word I bet you would have shut him up real fast; what he was saying is considered a racial slur to many hispanics. But these folks need to lighten up, its a kid for crying out loud! When my son was 3, we were in a restruant and a black couple sat near us. My son started yelling to DH, "Dad! Dad! See that black guy, Dad! You see him Dad, the black guy! He isnt black, Dad! He isnt BLACK! He's brown, Dad! the black guy is really brown! Hes not a real black guy then if he's brown!" My DH was ignoring him out of embarrassment. I shut him up asap, but it was said. the couple was nice, said, "Good job with your colors, little guy!"

    Answer by AngelicaDem at 1:58 PM on Sep. 12, 2011

  • I think they are kind of making a mountain out of a molehill,, I mean DS knew they were Spanish, and the last I knew that wasn't anything degrading,, I would go over (alone) and say,, I wanted you to know how much we appreciate you as neighbors, and Ds is only 4 and very interested in your culture,, I hope we can remain friends,, and it wouldn't hurt to bring one of your good cookie batches with you,, I wish YOU were my neighbor,,!

    Answer by kimigogo at 2:00 PM on Sep. 12, 2011

  • i think they are being stupid. i mean so what if they are s[anish and your son was saying this. i mean obviously they are and they shouldn't mind being so. i am half spanish myself and i don't mind being called gringa or spanish. thats what i am. if they are being this stupid i would just leave it alone. i think one day they will come to their senses and start talking to you. just be nice as you have been. this is just plain stupid.

    Answer by melody77 at 3:02 PM on Sep. 12, 2011

  • How do they expect a 4 year old to know the difference between Spanish, Mexican, Puerto Rician....It sounds like they had more of an issue with someone not of their race being there. Your son didn't say anything derogatory.
    I haven't had anything like this happen. But, I was worried it would. It was either my younger son or my daughter that said 'Black people aren't black, they are brown. I'm not white, I'm peach (or apricot)'. Technically it's correct, but you never know how others will react.

    Answer by Raine2001 at 3:15 PM on Sep. 12, 2011

  • troll go away

    Comment by Christmaslver68 (original poster) at 1:54 PM on Sep. 12, 2011

  • try talking to ur friends and then try to explain to them what was goin on i hope and wish u the best

    Answer by tisha999 at 2:46 PM on Sep. 12, 2011