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How do I not get so mad at him?

My son is almost 16 months old and I find myself yelling at him so much. I want to enjoy him, he makes it so hard though. How do I not get so frustrated, how can I calmly handle situations without it getting so out of hand?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:06 PM on Dec. 31, 2008 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (9)
  • Stop and think before you speak. I know it's not easy....God know's I have a hard time with it also in many areas of my life....but if you can count to 3 and then correct him (unless it's an emergency and he's going to get hurt) then you might find your tone of voice changing towards him. Just know that it will not last forever....they do grow up quickly and then your wondering where the time went. Hang in there!

    Answer by Southerncharmes at 4:11 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Breath 3x first before saying anything... I hear mama its ruff but just stay calm...

    Answer by HottMamaRossx2 at 4:13 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • i have no idea what he is doing but remember that he is a baby. and remember that he is learning from you. when you yell at him, he'll learn that that is the way to react and he'll do the same when he is older. take a deep, deep breath. breath slowly and count to ten. just try not to react so quickly. act, don't react if that makes any sense. try to give him as much positive reinforcement when he is NOT acting out. he is not old enough to try to make you angry on purpose. he doesn't mean it. put it all in perspective. when he is 16, are you going to regret spending so much of your time with him as a baby upset? maybe you need to get out of the house more or join a play group to help both of you. good luck. give him lots of love and security and one day, when he's older, he'll treat his wife and children the same.

    Answer by have2travel at 4:14 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • My daughter is 22 months and she just started driving me crazy, too. Just don't feel bad! Try not to yell because it's not good for either of you, it just ups the stress level... But most importantly, don't feel guilty about finding parenting a toddler hard! It IS HARD! MY girl frustrates me so much sometimes I just wanna throw her out the window! So try some patience building techniques and give yourself a break, mama! :)

    Answer by MamaCatCat at 4:19 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • MamaCatCat:

    Thanks for posting that. Sometimes I want to throw my kid out the window, too.

    I think babies were made to be cute, otherwise we really would do it haha

    Answer by weezer_cookie at 4:45 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I have a baby who is almost 16 months old. Note that I said baby, b/c at that age they are just that, still a baby. He is trying to explore the action/reaction thing and will test you just to see what reaction he gets. I rarely if ever yell at my son, I remember my sister used to tell me this when my other two were at this age "Redirect them to doing something else when they are doing something you don't want them to" Honestly, I never believed her until I now have my youngest, it works like a charm. If he is getting into my cigarettes (I occassionally leave them within his reach, and sometimes he climbs to get them, lol) I just take them, say no firmly and give him something else to play with. I really feel like that is the way to teach them to not get into stuff b/c they can't grasp the right/wrong thing yet. gl, if you want to talk pm me :)

    Answer by mikeyjavimami21 at 5:02 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Remember that everything he is doing is developmentally appropriate.
    Get things you don't want him touching out of his reach..
    Make an effort to spend one on one time with him- we tend to forget as our children get more independent, and then suddenly the whining starts, and that drives us up the wall, and we wonder just what the hell they want because they are now able to play alone.. Well, they don't always WANT to play alone. They may be mobile, but they still need mommy to interact with them as they learn..
    And redirection, redirection, redirection!! I cannot stress this enough!!! Yelling is useless. Instead of yelling, find a new activity for your child to engage in.

    Answer by Liyoness at 6:54 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I agree w/ last 2 except cigs. I'm as impatient as anyone no thks to my "neglected" (keyword) rearing. Babies are not only a miracle but a privilege. I am privileged to have this DD. Mind you I have had years of Aunt experience for the fun times, but was lonely w/out my own long desired child. Thats the diff w/some of us mamas. Some just have them like, excuse term, taking a crap, and poof there's a baby; others try and try and try and wow here's my gift for trying so hard to have you, that there is no way I will treat her as anything less than a wonderful gift. She is the boss of my life cuz I know I couldnt live w/out her. She is learning to be an earthling from me and I want her to be happy as she now makes me. Sunlight makes the flowers bloom. Seasons change and then we're gone.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:53 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Dear Mom, There is some great advice that you have been given. We all get fustrated and upset, but what makes us different is how we react. Every night I pray to be a better mom than I was that day. Look at your baby while he sleeps and remember he is a part of you. Then remember that when you get upset and take youself away if you feel like you'rel going to yell at him. Find friends that you can talk to and know you're not alone. And if you don't have someone you can talk to PM me.

    ~Mommy of two.

    Answer by tantie at 9:51 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

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