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I might be in the minority, but I don't think i can breastfeed! My breasts have been such a sexual part of my body and now they are going to be so functional. I guess I feel really selfish for feeling this way, but I don't know if I can get past it. I know it's so much better for the baby! Is anyone else struggling with this, any advice?

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Asked by kaylan010 at 4:38 PM on Dec. 31, 2008 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 20 (8,682 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Some people do feel that way. You may feel different after the baby is born, or you may not. You can always try it and see how it goes. Even doing it for a short period of time is good for you and your baby. You could also try just pumping and bottle feeding - there's nothing wrong with that either. If it never feels right, your baby will be ok drinking formula. I have a friend who never intended to breastfeed, but her doctor said something to her towards the end of her first pregnancy that made her decide to give it a try. She did it with both her babies, and now she wonders why she ever thought she didn't want to do it. Whatever you decide is right for you will be ok.

    Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 4:48 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • It's about context. Think about it like your mouth. Now, your mouth has two distinctly non sexual primary functions ... eating and breathing. But it sure is fun to kiss and well ... I'll leave the rest to your imagination. Breasts are the same way. They have one primary function, feeding infants, they were primarily designed to produce milk to feed to infants, but they have a secondary sexual function. They are only sexual within the context of sexual use. The feel of an infant nursing is quite different from fondly from a lover or husband. It's not the same thing at all.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:01 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Honestly, you won't know until you try. And if you try and can't do least you know you tried!!!

    I have some sensory issues and when I tried it was the worst experience I've ever had. There's no way I could do it. Kudos to those who do/can!

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:11 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I like the PP's answer. That is a very good point and can be used for many body parts. Your hands and mouth are used for sexual purposes but you will hold your child's hand and give them kisses without a second thought. You have to realize that breasts are overtly sexual in our society just because we are told they are. In other countries a woman's feet are seen as very sexual. Of course breasts are a sexual body part but hey, so are feet for many. But the main reason we see them as such is because of our society's ideals. You may feel better about it to try to seperate sexual from nurturing uses of breasts. Maybe watch videos or look at pics of babies nursing.


    Answer by TanyaR1024 at 5:15 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • You will see that it is not a sexual thing at all. You will notice how motherly and nursing it looks. You will be in such a "mom" place most of the day, it will be hard to make the transition to "lover" when you need to whether you nurse or not. But it IS possible to make the transition with some effort. Also, don't forget that formula is the 4th choice for infant feeding. First is breastfeeding, second is drinking moms pumped milk, 3rd is donated breastmilk. I think everyone has those concerns but if you give it a try you will realize that motherly and sexual fit into the same person in very distinct areas.

    Answer by TanyaR1024 at 5:15 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • This isn't a matter of "can't", but not wanting to.
    My breasts have always been sexualized, although not by me (they're huge..).. I've always had an aversion to having my nipples touched, sucked, licked, etc... I honestly thought I wouldn't be able to breastfeed because of this.. The thought just made me cringe.
    I breastfed my oldest daughter for 2 years, and am now onto my second..
    I LOVE breastfeeding.
    There is nothing sexual about it.. It's one of the very rare truly innocent things out there.. It's amazing. Someone could stick a gun to my head and I still wouldn't give it up.

    Answer by Liyoness at 6:38 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I was in the same boat as you. In the end I chose to not to breastfeed. It was a personal decision that i felt most comfortable with.

    Answer by smnice at 7:40 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I'm w/Liyoness, DH and I had ideas about BF milk, but that went out the window. A mother becomes a real mother when she instinctively responds to her child and that DID happen to me as I never realized (what a shame for my whole adult life to not know this); I responded to feeding my child, but I had a good reason to start, my own health issues told be it is better for her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:38 AM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • When I first thought about breastfeeding, I felt the same way. After I did research and found all the benefits, I started changing my mind. Breastfeeding is a huge committment. It's not easy in the beginning, but I would give it a fair chance because of all the benefits it will provide your baby. You should try and see if you change your mind. There is nothing sexual about breastfeeding, and my husband enjoys my breasts now more than ever since I've firmed up and grown a size!

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:54 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

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