Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

22 month old wont sleep...

he decided that he will no longer sleep in his bed, and since he can open doors, and can climb, i am having to shut him in his room. which with the screaming, and kicking the door i am getting no sleep. he is sleeping on his floor and refuses to have anything to do with his bed. he was fine a week ago. and i have a night light and dvds. but he is screaming up to 4 hours a night off and on. what should i do

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:02 PM on Dec. 31, 2008 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (16)
  • 1.Someone (your son) is testing who has the power.
    2.Gear yourself up, you'll be in for a real battle. Invest in coffee. :D
    3.As soon as your son climbs out, place him back in his bed and say 'Big boys stay in their bed and sleep, goodnight *enter sons name here*', then leave the room. If he climbs out again, place him back in his crib and tell him firmly 'Go to bed *sons name* in your bed' then leave again. If he climbs out again, dont worry you're not going to say a word to him, you're to just pick him up, lay him back in bed and leave. You'll keep up this routine until he learns that you are not going to quit. (MORE COMING)
    cthorn14

    Answer by cthorn14 at 5:13 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • 4. In between this time, he may start to kick/bite/scream/punch/etc. You are to only say one, firm word 'NO' thats it, everytime he starts you say 'NO' and lay him in his bed. Eventually he will learn that the power struggle he has is gone and you will not put up with this sort of behaviour. And, you better be ready for the next battle because he'll try to find another way to have a power struggle with you. :D good luck!
    cthorn14

    Answer by cthorn14 at 5:16 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • He's becoming more aware of his surroundings- bedrooms can be scary places at night, all alone.
    Why not fall asleep with him?
    Imagine being 30" tall, shut in a great big room all by yourself, in the dark... I'd scream bloody murder, too.
    Liyoness

    Answer by Liyoness at 6:56 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Personally, I would never take the first poster's advice.
    Allowing your child a voice, and to have feelings does not mean he is "in control". It means that you are allowing him to be his own person, with his own personality, his own fears.
    Why in the world shouldn't a BABY still need his mommy at night??

    Where does your husband sleep, by the way? Does he sleep across the house, away from you? Do you shut the door on him when he wants to cuddle with you to fall asleep?
    Liyoness

    Answer by Liyoness at 6:57 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • ditto what Liyoness said :)
    epoh

    Answer by epoh at 6:59 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Liyoness & epoh: When you sleep with your children, it causes them to rely on you too much. You want your children to grow up strong and independent but also confident. If your children always need you, how are they to ever grow up? And Liyoness, you werent asking the question. So you have no worries. Good luck to you both.
    To Anon: You take what information you think is best, it was merely a suggestion and I was trying to help.
    cthorn14

    Answer by cthorn14 at 7:18 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Actually, when you sleep with your children/ fall asleep with them, it makes them more secure because they know they can count on you. Rather than making them tough out their fears, insecurities, or worries on their own they know that they have someone who cares enough about them to help them through.
    And at 2 years old I do not expect my child to be grown up.
    I have no worries because I listen to my children, rather than what other mothers are doing. I trust myself to do what is best for my child - not the advice of parents who can't bother to spare 20 minutes to lay down with their children at night.
    Liyoness

    Answer by Liyoness at 7:49 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I would encourage 99% of the posters here to do the same thing.. We need not feed off the insecurites of other moms and give them poor advice. Personally, I want every mom here to be the best mom she can be. And that means listening to what her child wants and needs rather than what other moms deem her child "should" be doing.. A 2 year old is not on a power trip simply because he wants his mommy close when he's falling asleep. I pity the poor children with mothers who believe such terrible things about their own children!
    Liyoness

    Answer by Liyoness at 7:52 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I can only give you the advice that my pediatrician gave me. My daughter started the same thing at 19 months. He had me put a safety door knob on her side of the door so that it would not open. He said to give her about 30 minutes of time for just the two of us we would read books or sing songs in her room.It is important that it takes place in the room so your child can become more comfortable. I was told to make sure that she had a sippy cup of water. He said to then tell her goodnight and shut the door. I was told not to go back in the room unless I thought she was in some type of danger. He told me it didn't matter where she slept in her room. It took almost 5 full days. It was hard to hear her cry and not go to her. For almost two weeks she slept on her floor.
    singlemom5481

    Answer by singlemom5481 at 8:45 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Now at 22 months she happily goes to bed at night on her own and say bye bye mommy see you in the morning.I do not see any ill effects from following my pediatrician's advice. I am a single working mom and I need my own peaceful sleep as much as she does. You need to do what you think is best for you and your child.
    singlemom5481

    Answer by singlemom5481 at 8:45 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.