Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I have lost the want

Ok ladies this maybe a little TMI but I need some advise. I love my husband with all my heart and would never do anything to hurt him, but I dont have the want or need to have sex anymore. we do have a 8 1/2 month old who keeps us pretty busy, and I dont want to alsways be blaming it on the fact that I am too tired from takin care of the baby, but I just dont want to do it anymore. Has this happened to anyone else? What can I do to get back into my old self that was very active? any advise ladies would be great

Answer Question
 
Quintensmom

Asked by Quintensmom at 10:41 PM on Dec. 31, 2008 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 7 (158 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • Maybe do something really romantic,
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:44 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Yes, girl, you are not the first, nor the last. You should talk to your Dr. It is a very understandable thing for new moms. You are just too busy and that's the last thing on your mind. While your SO is probably thinking that is the only thing that makes your life seem the way it was before. It's perfectly normal. Like I said, talk to your Dr. to make sure all is well, but I would bet it will get better as the child gets older. Talk to your SO as well, make sure he understands the kind of pressure you have on you right now.
    pupmom

    Answer by pupmom at 10:45 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • NORMAL!!!!! It took nine months to make a baby. It takes a least nine months to recover. You'll get it back. Just give yourself time. As the baby gets bigger you'll get back to yourself.
    desert_diva

    Answer by desert_diva at 10:46 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • im with you girl and it has nothing to do with havin a baby i just don't want sex anymore we can cuddle he can hug me but don't get sexual
    jodi205

    Answer by jodi205 at 10:48 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • lol me too. I have a six month old. For me it's partly because I am still overweight and am not happy with my post baby body, but also I just never think about sex anymore and I never masterbate anymore ( sorry for the TMI) which I used to do regularly. Maybe we are just out of practice and you have to just get back into it. Maybe a new outfit?..or whatever would make you feel sexier or get you in the mood...probably different for everyone...have a drink :) It's New Years Eve make your hubby happy
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:51 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • ARe you on medication or birth control? That could be the reason. I agree, see a doctor. Also, is there something else that is bothering you? Does he help around the house and with the baby?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:51 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • well i don't know about OP but i just don't wnat it my daughter is now almost fifteen months old and i have no desire
    jodi205

    Answer by jodi205 at 10:53 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Thank you ladies for the support there is more on my mind but its long and I think I would bore most of you. BUT I really appreciate the answers and I think I will call the doc monday. Thank you all
    Quintensmom

    Answer by Quintensmom at 10:58 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I am in the same boat with you...we have a 4 month old and I love my husband but sex is the farthest and i mean FARTHEST thing from my mind. I have no desire whatsoever. We have started taking like a date night every now and then and let my mom watch her and maybe it helps to start out slow again. Because it has been a long time and just treat it like it's new again.
    calliesmommie

    Answer by calliesmommie at 11:02 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Well the thing with doing something romantic is he leaves sunday until March then he will be home for two weeks and we are going to see his parents then and then he leaves again till Dec ;( so its hard to think about doing it with the though of him leaving me soon! (we are both military if that explains anything too)
    Quintensmom

    Answer by Quintensmom at 11:05 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN