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How old were you when you had your baby and how do you think you were treated differently? (because I am a teen mom and I am wondering if you guys are treated the same way I am.)


Asked by amber710 at 10:53 PM on Dec. 31, 2008 in General Parenting

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Answers (15)
  • Then they tend to give you their two cents where it's not needed. Being a young mother is hard enought without them looking down on us. They can never get past your age or relationship and see how hard we work. Guess they think everythings done half assed bcecause we are young. I'm going back to work, going to law school, and most important raising my daughter. I don't think im half assing anything. Who are the to judge anyway. Blow them of and tell them to mind to themselves. Good luck, i re-wrote my post because I read you question wrong lol.

    Answer by letlovegrow at 1:34 AM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • I'm not a teen mom but maybe I can help if you'd like to share.

    Answer by LovingParent08 at 10:59 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Well I am 27 now but when I got pregnant with my daughter I was 17 and had her when I was 18. I hated the way people treated me. I had people offer to come in the home and play with her, like I could not do that myself. It is like people thought because I was young that I could not be a good mother. Now whenever people talk about how bad it is for teenagers to have children I ask why. I know people who were much older than I was and they were horrible mothers.

    My daughter is now 8, almost 9 and she has a wonderful life, she is very smart and well adjusted. I was 24 when I had my son and was the same type of mother I was when I was 18.

    Do not listen to people's crap about teens not being good mothers, it is just absurd! I'm sure you are a wonderful mother and good luck in the future!

    Answer by jordanmarie2000 at 11:01 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • Aww I'm sorry hun. IMO, age doesn't make a difference in how you will/won't raise your kids. I was 28, 29 and 32 and HELL I STILL SCREW UP. It's human nature b/c kids don't come with directions or a handbook. It's a learn as you go experience. And yes, some may be a little more mature at a younger age, but not always. In fact, I know some women who are the opposite and definitely should have waited. Look at this way: Is your child neglected? Does he/she have a roof over their head? Clean clothes on their back? Food on the table? Love and affection from you? My guess is no (being neglected) and yes to the rest. Therefore, YOU'RE DOING SOMETHING RIGHT SO KEEP DOING IT!!!! And opinions are like assholes, everybody has one and I'm thinking that the same people who are treating you like this probably have a ton of skeletons in their closet that if they were to come out.................(you get my drift)

    Answer by LovingParent08 at 11:23 PM on Dec. 31, 2008

  • I am 20 but I look younger. When people see that I have a baby they treat me like I must be an unempoyed drop-out. I always get "so are you in school" "yes" and then a big "OH REALLY ??!!" and the same with "are you working? " People always want to offer advise because they think I dont know how to take care of her. I always get "thats your baby ? How old are you ?" I am sure they dont mean it in a rude way ... or think they are being snide but I really hate it. I try to blow it off but I just cant stand the stereotyping thrown at young mothers. I always have to bite my tongue .... hard.

    Answer by Samantha19 at 12:48 AM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • I had my dd at 15. I got treated like shit for it. I basically told people that when they are living my life taking care of a baby working and going to school at 15 and doing it on my own, then they can talk sh*t, until then STFU. The way I see it is no one can tell you anything to hurt you, it should only matter how you feel or think.

    Answer by BIMOM21 at 1:15 AM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • I'm 19 now and have a one month old little girl, I was 18 when I got pregnant. I was vey much a stereotype highschool drop out, moved in with a guy, no job, then I got pregnant, the relationship fell through, I got kicked out, and went crawling back home. Not only was I a teen mom but now a single one too. Which made thing that much worse in peoples eyes.
    When they found out my age they treated me like I was stupid, I'm not stupid. I made stupid choices theres a difference. And when they ask where the father is I'd shrug and they would roll their eyes.

    Answer by letlovegrow at 1:34 AM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • 15 with my first and yes, many people made assumptions. I'm 25 and people still make them, such is life.

    Answer by Pauline3283 at 2:03 AM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • i was 17 when i got prego and 18 when i had my sister was even younger...people will always have something to say.... but i just prove the statistics wrong and show no matter my age i am a damn good mother and will succeed :):) happy new year

    Answer by JuLiAnSmOmMy317 at 2:41 AM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • I had my daughter 5 days after my 19th b-day, people look at me and my husband funny, but I have noticed we are better parents than people double our age! I'm tiny and look 16, so that doesn't help any, I haven't actuallybeen disrespected by someone, but I'm told I'm too young pretty often, I just ignore them, they're not worth the time... I am a true believer that age is merely a number, and I have been through and experienced more than most people much older than me... Also, depending on the maturity level one carries their self makes a difference in how people in general react to someone being a young parent. I was however a little upset by the hospital I delivered my daughter in though, they all thought I was an amazing first time mother, but made me stay an "extra" day due to the fact that they thought I was too young and as was my husband, that was extremely irritating!


    Answer by HMHUTSON at 2:53 AM on Jan. 1, 2009