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Dateraped, and pregnnant

I was date-raped a little over a month ago. Today I found out I am pregnant. I'm scared. I'm 20 years old, and the only reason we didn't go to the police was b/c of the family ties related to this boy and my mom was scared to lose that family bond. Now I'm pregnant andI don't know what to do. I know how everyone on this site feels toward abortion, but I can't bear to bring a child thru the pain in life of having a thief and rapist as his father and to half so many people hate him for how he was brought intoo this world. I don't know if I'm looking for answers, prayers, or just helping hands, but i really need help right now...

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:28 PM on Jan. 1, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (14)
  • No one is going to hate the child , not his fault .
    I suggest you get yourself some councelling at the very least to deal with the emotional turmoil you must be going through .
    Good Luck !
    Meshell7

    Answer by Meshell7 at 12:31 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • please excuse my spelling, im shoken up right now
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:32 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • Not everyone here feels that abortion is wrong. You will find many Pro Choice moms here. Even many Pro Life moms who would support you in your decision. I wish you the best. You have to make this decision based on what you can handle and what you feel is right. I'm sorry you are going through this and I'm sorry you may not have the family backing you should have concerning the rape charges.

    Southerncharmes

    Answer by Southerncharmes at 12:34 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • My son came from rape. I was 16. I didnt go to the police because it was my boyfriends father and they would have killed me. When I turned up pregnant I knew whos he was. I still keep him because I couldnt go through life knowing I had an abortion and didnt let a little childwho did nothing wrong not have a chance. I have sence left that BF and have found someone else who knows what happened and LOVES my son like his. Not many people know they dont have to. Could you give the baby up for adoption that way someone has a chance to love the baby.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:34 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • I'm sorry about what happened to you. I think you should report this, this guy should not get away with this, if he does he'll probably do this to other girls. How will you feel about that, knowing you might have prevented it. As for the innocent child you are caring, know normal person could hate a child because of how they were conceived. If it will be to difficult for you to raise this child because of how he/she was conceirved, there is always adoption. There are so many people who can't concieve and would love your baby.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:37 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • I am so sorry for what has happened. I couldnt imagine what youre going through.
    I dont know what to tell you, except I will pray for you.
    You could always give the child up for adoption, there are so many couples looking for a young child to give a greaat home to. You could consider keeping it and just love him/her for being your child & creation. After you feel those first little kicks,hear the the heartbeart,and see your own child on an ultrasound you would probably love it no matter what.
    I'm not pressing this on you, i am just giving options.
    Good Luck & God Bless you, no matter what choice you choose.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:41 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • Your parents are wrong for putting themselves first, I don't understand that.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:46 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • you don't want to bring the child in the world but you are keeping it from the police so the guy can do it again to somebody else? think of how this had effected your llife and then decide if you still want o not go to the police. it is you choice NOT UR MOMS!! as for the baby you are in a tough situation the baby is not at fault and everything happens for a reason. an abortion is an option keeping the child is an option but the best thing i can think of is addoption. give a chance for a family to raise a baby. we are all getting older and to give somebody that i think is a wonderful thing. whatever you decide please tell the police or you can stat feeling guilty for all the other lives you are letting him hurt. if the family is close and loves you then they will always be there...
    chacha101

    Answer by chacha101 at 1:20 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • 1st off, He needs to suffer the consequences of what he has done. I think you should do what you feel in your heart is best for YOU AND THE BABY (no one else). If you think that you can look passed how this baby came to be and love the baby unconditionally then, have the baby. but if you don’t think you can, then no one should judge you. But dont base your decision on anyone but you and that baby, no one else can tell you whats best, not any of us not your family no one but you.. But remember if you chose to have the baby and you dont go to the police about what happen to you then he has parental rights to the baby. And will always be in yours and the baby's life. I hope anything that i have said was not misunderstood , and I hope it helped. You are in my thoughts and in my prayers. good luck , God bless and remember no one else matters here but you and the baby.
    Alorasmommy

    Answer by Alorasmommy at 1:42 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • I'm sorry this happened to you. I know that you must feel abortion is the only way, but remember, you can't erase something hurtful with something even more painful. This baby is half yours and although the baby didn't come out of love between two people, there are plenty of other people who will love the baby. Yes, it's a painful thing to go through but a baby is a blessing. I can say that b/c we had a stillborn, no i wasn't raped, but my doctors told me to abort and I didn't. If i would have, I would have never forgaven myself. Some women can never get pregnant again after an abortion and some never recover emotionally. Please just consider your options. As for the family ties, that's ridiculous. Go to the police! I also want you to know that there are several single Mom's here.... the Dad isn't always there but your children need you, as does this baby.
    AshJoe05

    Answer by AshJoe05 at 2:04 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

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