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Would you try to find your brother?

My brother and his wife are apparently hiding from both families. He drinks and does other questionable stuff..... They used to live really close to us. They were kicked out of two homes in the past year in our neighborhood. Before that they lost their house b/c of non-payment of the mortgage. He has not been to see our mother or called her that I know of. She suffers from alzheimer's disease. She still remembers everyone now. And she asks about him a lot. I'm not sure what I should do. I tried to get his phone number, but apparently they don't have a phone. I've heard they live in a community close to ours. But I have no one that actually talks to him or sees him except in passing on the streets. I miss him. Even though he is not in the best place in his life, I think he will regret it if he doesn't try to see Mama soon.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:50 PM on Jan. 1, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Yep I would .
    Good Luck !
    Meshell7

    Answer by Meshell7 at 12:51 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • I think you should try and contact him so you can give him the option of visiting. Once he is informed of your mother's health then it is up to him as to what he does with it. I am very sorry your family is going through this.

    Southerncharmes

    Answer by Southerncharmes at 12:52 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • He is well aware of her health. I'm not sure if he's afraid to see her like she is, or if he just doesn't care to see her. I'm not sure. I told him the last time I talked to him....in June to call her or go see her that she wasn't that bad and that she was asking for him. He said he would go see her.....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:55 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • I think he will feel bad too but I am assuming he knows she is ill already. U can try one more time but it sounds to me like he doesn't want to be found. I am going thru the same addiction issues w/my bro and right now he cannot deal w/real life so I have let him go for now. I love him , but I cannot save him. Sounds like your bro might be in the same place as mine-I would let it go, love him, but let him figure it out.Let me know if u would like to talk, it's a very painful situation and (hugs) to u .
    Bearsjen

    Answer by Bearsjen at 12:57 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • Okay, I understand now. I think you have done your part. BUT if it would make you feel better and if contacting him is a decision you think would make living with your moms condition easier in some way for you then I would do that. Sometimes we have to do what makes our hearts and souls at rest even though the chances are still the same that he will not go see her.
    Southerncharmes

    Answer by Southerncharmes at 1:07 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • Try putting their names into google and other search engines. Something might come up. You're right he'll regret not being there for your Mom. Good Luck!
    PeytonNBella

    Answer by PeytonNBella at 1:44 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • some ppl keep in touch with friends and family via the Internet. If you have a myspace or facebook (or whatever is popular now) you could post about your mom's condition and suggest it would be nice if your brother went home to visit her. Some ppl stay away from families when things go back out of shame for not doing better or letting down the family. Unfortunately they leave the family when they need to be surrounded by family and receive moral support. Yes do whatever you can to find him and let him make the final decision if he wants to come home.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:04 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

  • i would try and its important that you let him know that even if he's not in the best place in his life, even if you don't agree with his life you are still his sis and you still love him, does he know about your mom?
    mommie2twogirls

    Answer by mommie2twogirls at 5:54 PM on Jan. 1, 2009

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