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4 Bumps

What would you do if your husband got another woman pregnant and wanted you to stay?

Actually, I know it's hard to say what anybody would do unless they were in this situation. Has anybody been through this before? Did you work it out or move on?
My husband had a 4 month affair and the woman is pregnant, SHE is the one who told me about the affair and the baby, she knew about me the whole time.
Now he's dropped her and the baby like a bad habit and says he has made a major life change (since I moved out) because he can't be without me and the kids. He says he loves me and will wait a lifetime, never give up, getting counseling, started praying and going to church. As of now, I don't believe a word he says. Just kinda wondering if anyone has been through something like this and what was there experience. (I HOPE nobody has, I don't wish this on my worst enemy!)

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:24 PM on Sep. 23, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (27)
  • I have no experience, sorry to hear you are going through this, Im not sure how I would handle it.
    2teens2LOs

    Answer by 2teens2LOs at 3:25 PM on Sep. 23, 2011

  • He would never see me again. I can't say the same for the kids, but I would find someone else to take the kids to him. He wouldn't want me to see him again.
    hopeandglory53

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 3:27 PM on Sep. 23, 2011

  • As someone who has been through an affair- they aren't really sorry unless it is the one cheating who tells you everything. If they wait until they are caught and THEN are sorry- they are only sorry for getting caught or found out.

    I'm sorry you are going through this. I hope you find all the strength you need to do whatever it is you need to do for YOU.
    meandrphoto

    Answer by meandrphoto at 3:29 PM on Sep. 23, 2011

  • i would not stay - another thing that bugs me about your hubby is that he dropped the baby and the mom like a bad habit tsk tsk...what good man would walk away from his baby ? he is a monster for walking away from HIS child - that does not mean he has to marry the other woman but come on!!!! what he is doing to that baby is equivalent to you dropping your kiddos you have now just to be with another man. your hubby has no integrity. i would not want to be with a guy who is willing to walk away from his kids....
    gwen20

    Answer by gwen20 at 3:30 PM on Sep. 23, 2011

  • I couldn't stay with him, no matter how much it hurt to leave. I could never get over that.
    Orionsgirl

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 3:31 PM on Sep. 23, 2011

  • That bothers me too, about him wanting nothing to do with his child! I think if he has truly "changed" he would figure something out. She lives across the country though too, but still!
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:33 PM on Sep. 23, 2011

  • I honestly don't know what to do,, I cannot have more children and wanted them so much! I guess you have to search very deep in your heart and ask yourself if you can accept the child, on one hand I could, but on another, I don't know how you get over the pain. If there was no baby involved could you forgive him? If the answer is yes, then maybe you can do this, one thing for sure is he needs a paternity test the minute the baby is born. Is she willing to have him in the child's life, if you and he are together. I am so so sorry momma, and my heart breaks for you.
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 3:35 PM on Sep. 23, 2011

  • Thanks for the comments, he's making me think I'm crazy for leaving! He says I am choosing to break our family apart, I said you chose this when you did what you did!
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:35 PM on Sep. 23, 2011

  • He said he's positive it's his, they were together every night, this happened while he was away, I probably shouldn't say this but he's military and they were both deployed..
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:36 PM on Sep. 23, 2011

  • I would leave. I can deal with cheating if he came to me and was honest. Getting another woman pregnant...thats a deal breaker. I am sorry you are going through this.
    ashisamom

    Answer by ashisamom at 3:38 PM on Sep. 23, 2011

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