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Need ur opinion....

Ok this is kinda a long question/story so i will try to keep it short... My husbands dad wants to watch are son over night at his house. My son is only 5 months old and i think he is way to young to be over there over night but he keeps on asking and i keep saying no. but he seems not to get it. Also he drinks every night (around 12 to 20 beers)and i dont want my son exposed to that. I feel that if he wants to watch him he cant drink that night. but every one on his side of the family except my hubby is made at me and says that i have no right to do that or say that but i think i am just looking out for the safety of my son. What do you momma's think????

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:59 PM on Jan. 2, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • Forgive me for saying so, but there is no way in hell that I would let my child go over there. First of all, I think that it is your decision if you think that your 5 month old should stay away from you for the night or not. Furthermore, if he drinks that much every night...there is no way that he should be trusted to be responsible for your child! Who cares if the family is mad about it? If they cant see the danger in it, then they are crazy!
    GraciesMomLJP

    Answer by GraciesMomLJP at 12:03 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • ummm first off, Who Cares If They Are Mad At You!!! I have a mother who drinks in excess and i would never let her watch either of my children when she is in that state especially letting them stay overnight. If you feel that your child isn't ready to stay overnight somewhere, then don't let him. you will do nothing but worry about ti all night. I don't blame you at all for not wanting to expose your son to that kind of behavior.Stand by your decision and hopefully hubby will back you up!! if they get upset that is their problem not yours. you just need to worry about your son and his well being
    klbnkndsmm

    Answer by klbnkndsmm at 12:05 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • I agree...your husband should support your decision.
    Jan40

    Answer by Jan40 at 12:05 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • you have every right to say what some one can and can not do while watching your child, anyone who says differently is an idiot!
    btw, way to go hubby for supporting you, too many don't when its wife vs. "family"
    bi-polarmommy

    Answer by bi-polarmommy at 12:09 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • There is no way I would leave my child with someone that has a known alcohol problem. His judgment will be impaired, who knows if he would wake up if your child needed him.... too many risks. You would never forgive yourself if something happened. You're doing the right thing - stick to your guns. I don't think you have to give specific reasons, I would just say your son is too young to be spending the night there. I wouldn't ask him not to drink -- he would likely just lie to you and claim he wouldn't. I've actually had a house fire in the middle of the night - after living through that I couldn't IMAGINE leaving my kids with someone that might be out of their senses or passed out at night. No way. No hell. No how.
    Serafyna

    Answer by Serafyna at 12:17 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • Stick to your guns on this one, Mommy!! Your baby is only 5 MONTHS OLD.He is FAR TOO YOUNG to be away from his mommy overnight. NO WAY would I allow my baby to spend the night away from me at that age. And who cares what his REDNECK family thinks? Your son's needs come first, not their feelings or their "hillbilly pride"!
    Aprilmorgans

    Answer by Aprilmorgans at 12:19 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • You have every right to demand that people watching your son have a clear head and be responsible. I don't see how being an alcoholic is responsible. Does his family drink like his dad? Who cares what they think, you're the one who's to deal with the decisions regarding your son. What does your FIL do when he's drinking? Mine would fall asleep on the couch with a lit smoke in his hand! So many holes in his couch! He would also order chinese food and pass out.
    Ask your husband seriously if he would feel comfortable with his father caring for his son like that. Ask him what his father is like when he's drinking. Suppose your son wakes in the night and needs to be comforted. Could he do that, would he hear him or would he scare him with his drunken slurring. Seriously! Is your husband letting you take the fall for this with his family?
    AmandaH321

    Answer by AmandaH321 at 12:26 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • I think you have to trust your instincts. My dad is a drinker (not 12-20 beers a night, but still enough to give me pause if her were gonna keep my child by himself overnight), but my stepmom was never that big on it...until recently. I found out a month or so ago that she has started drinking heavily over the past few months as well. So, as much as I appreciate the reprieve, I have to take a step back and not let them keep my son anymore. I still love them...I just don't trust their judgement when they are drinking, and I am simply not going to risk my son's well-being.
    owensmom17

    Answer by owensmom17 at 12:29 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • um, why is everyone bashing the hubby? she said everyone on his side of the family EXECPT her hubby was mad at her for the decision
    bi-polarmommy

    Answer by bi-polarmommy at 12:32 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • I have no problem with a 5 mo staying overnight at g'parents house. However, if the guardian is drinking in excess, he does not need to be caring for a baby. I often drink at night after my 15 mo goes to bed, but there is always someone in the house who could drive to the hospital in an emergency. This is a necessity. Always do what you--forget everybody else--think is right for your child.
    BobbysMom2007

    Answer by BobbysMom2007 at 1:10 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

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