Is anyone else grieving over having had a C-section rather than a natural birth?

I had my son this way seven months ago and I still can't get over it. Why? This is sooo silly but it still bothers me to this day!!

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LaurenKaye29

Asked by LaurenKaye29 at 4:36 PM on Jan. 14, 2009 in Pregnancy

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Answers (36)
  • What? Why? I had 2 by choice..What is your grief about? Aren't you more thankful you have a healthy son?
    sydsmom2

    Answer by sydsmom2 at 4:38 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

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  • I know its silly. I was wierd about it at first but I'm trying to look past it but its not as bad as it used to be. I feel like I did something wrong.
    LaurenKaye29

    Answer by LaurenKaye29 at 4:39 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

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  • I also try to remember that he's healthy too and it helps me snap out of it but its still a feeling that burdens me.
    LaurenKaye29

    Answer by LaurenKaye29 at 4:40 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

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  • awww....its ok i had my c-section 2 years ago and it was my first! the numbness and all will go away when it hits a year or so.
    americansugar80

    Answer by americansugar80 at 4:40 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

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  • You feel this way because everyone sees on T.V this perfect birth with the baby being placed on your chest and its all wonderful and perfect, but that is not always reality. I had three c-sections. I wish it would have been like i wanted...like the t.v. version, but in order for my babies to come out of me, they had to be removed, they were all over 9lbs and I am only 4'11" and have a very flat pelvis. (I didn't know until I tried delivering my first baby natural) But, I got to see and hear them right away, but didn't cuddle until about an hour later. I love my kids and I jknow I can't change how they came into this world, but I will ALWAYS remember each of their births and seeing them and hearing them for the first time.
    Kimx3babies

    Answer by Kimx3babies at 4:41 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

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  • i had a scheduled c-section. had an infection which could have harmed my baby when giving normal birth. so i HAD TO have a c-section. and i still bother about it. i always wanted to give normal birth. it feels like im missing something. it bothers me a lot. and our daughter will be 2 in july :-/

    of course im so happy about having my daughter and of course i had no choice, but i still miss something. and since my husband doesnt want anymore kids (only our daughter) it bothers me even more.
    m.robertson811

    Answer by m.robertson811 at 4:43 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

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  • Well remember this..you didn't have to stretch out your vagina..(i know it goes back, but is never the same, per my doctor)
    sydsmom2

    Answer by sydsmom2 at 4:44 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

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  • This sounds bad but if I start feeling this way, I remember my friend who had a preemie and had a hard time and it helps me get out of it. My birth was pretty much an "emergency" situation and it's a painful memory. I start getting really mad when I think about the hospital experience because they also messed something up on him which made him really sick. It was a lousy experience. When I think of his birth, almost losing him comes to my mind. So yes, in the long run I'm grateful he's ok but this isn't a feeling I can shake in one day.
    LaurenKaye29

    Answer by LaurenKaye29 at 4:44 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

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  • Well at least my SO and I can have good sex...;-) Just kidding
    LaurenKaye29

    Answer by LaurenKaye29 at 4:44 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

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  • I understand how you feel. I had 3 c-sections and wish I could have had at least one naturally. I'm glad I have my girls and that they were healthy, but you still feel like you were cheated... It's one thing if you CHOOSE to have c-sections, but I never wanted one. The first time I had been in labor 23 hours and the baby was beginning to have problems. The second time the doctor promised me a VBAC and changed his mind the week before. And the third time I wasn't even given a choice since I had two previously.
    Silvertears1275

    Answer by Silvertears1275 at 4:46 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

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