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How do I teach my toddler to share?

My son is 2 and a half. His little brother is one. He just can not, will not, share.
If the little guy has it , no matter what it is, the older guy wants it. now. Maybe he's too young to understand? it's a real problem right now.


Asked by CASSAFRASS at 8:25 PM on Jan. 19, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (10)
  • This is normal. Are you familiar with the Toddler Rules of Property?
    If I like it, it's mine.
    If it's in my hand, it's mine.
    If I can take it from you, it's mine.
    If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
    If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
    If I'm doing or building something, all the pieces are mine.
    If it looks just like mine, it's mine.
    If I think it's mine, it's mine.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 8:41 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

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  • What can you do?
    Keep insisting that he share. Put him in time-out when he grabs something from the baby. Share things with HIM and talk about it while you are doing it - for example, get a big cookie and share it with him. He can still eat most of it but make a point of praising him for sharing it with you and how much you liked sharing it with him. Talk about how you share the road with the other drivers - the red and green stoplights are a good example of turn taking. Get Hi Ho Cherrios and play it with him while talking about taking turns and sharing the spinner. Most kids "get it" by about 3. Most are finally willing to share (but not happy about it) by 4.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 8:44 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

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  • i cant help ya my son doesnt like to share either....i found out where he hides his toys though i was cleaning tunder the chair and there was his stash of his car collection i laughed and then gave some to his sister lol...

    Answer by MommyOf2kids67 at 9:11 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

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  • i had that problem too. i told my older one that he could have it when his brother is done. and some for the little one when he wants what the bigger one has. i told my older one that he is much younger and doesnt understand how to share yet but maybe you can teach him and now they both share with eachother.

    Answer by Allboys0003 at 1:45 AM on Jan. 20, 2009

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  • offer whatever it is your trying to get him to share, than ask for it back and then ask if the other wants to use it. itll take a while but it usualy sticks

    Answer by etsmom0707 at 1:47 AM on Jan. 20, 2009

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  • we started teaching our son to share before he could talk or prob understand, but what we did and still do is everytime we think about it ( a lot ) if he wants something, about 45 seconds after he has it , we asked if he will share with us too, and when he was really little and couldnt "give" it, take it, smile big and make a big deal on what a great sharer he was! It was exciting and fun to share, it made mommy and daddy so happy and proud, very verbal...i would do that more than punish at this point(i do punish, it equals out,i think he needs to know its positive though) because if he never knew sharing before then now he may just feel like he is in trouble and not understand that sharing is a good thing that makes Mommy proud! :)

    Answer by SMB25 at 5:57 AM on Jan. 20, 2009

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  • oh yeah , i dont want the wrong idea given, even though we did that all the time so early, he still would on his first interactions with other children when he was around 1, he wouldnt want to share at first, and we got down with him and showed him and made the same big deal about it and clapped, etc and it only took a couple of times, after that when we were interacting, he would share and look at us, we made the big deal lol, and i dont even think he understood then, but it stuck, so it will stick after a while, sorry I know its got to be frustrating and hard to want to be positive about it like be nice when it is infuriating(sp)...

    Answer by SMB25 at 6:00 AM on Jan. 20, 2009

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  • When having new borns, you have to let your other children interact with them. They feel lefted out. You have to think like a child in order to get into their minds. They were the only child for awhile and now here comes someone else into the picture. You should teach your other children while you are pregnant the they will have a little sister or brother and as they get older you'll be sharing some of yours toys when you were younger. It's all about being involved. Let them touch the baby to get to know them and the other kids won't feel jealous. Explain to them that you were once a baby too, but this is your bother or sister and we're a family. Kids like to feel that they're helping out. You'd be surprise of the results if this was started when you were pregnant. It's never too late though. Toddlers can learn to cope if you just involved them. Give it a try for awhile.

    Answer by 4cooks at 7:47 AM on Jan. 20, 2009

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  • Sharing is one of the hardest things for children and parents. You just have to keep letting them know.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:56 AM on Jan. 20, 2009

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  • when you find out let me know,plz

    Answer by stacy1403 at 7:47 PM on Jun. 24, 2010

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