Does your teen own a car?

My 17 yr old drives my car because I refuse to buy her one, so she drives mine and acts as if it hers. She wants to have freedom and go where she pleases without relying on others, yet she uses my car and refuses to save for her own. So now she wants me to let her take herself and a carload of teens to a concert 90 minutes away. I keep telling her it's my car not hers.She says she gets that but just want to be the driver instead of relying on others. She gets good grades and stays out of trouble but is also self absorbed and suffers from "me-ism". I know my hubby will be against it and dd will just whine about how it's my car and he's not her dad. Should I feel guilty for not letting her go? am I just to overprotective?


Asked by wheresthewayout at 3:44 PM on Mar. 12, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

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Answers (6)
  • well i'm 20...and my mom told me when i was 15 if i want freedom and go drive all over the place i have to get a job and earn the money to buy my own I got a job and after awhile i got my own car...I dont think u should feel guilty...and i'm happy ur not one of those moms that buys ur kids cars and all that...cuz then there gonna think u'll buy them anything and everything!!! Just tell her to go with her friends...and if she whines and all that just walk away...

    hope this helps..

    Answer by nicole0709442 at 3:50 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

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  • are you preventing her from going because you're not comfortable with her driving that far away, or is it just the principle of the thing because it's your car? If you are unwilling to give her a car, you need to make that very plain, and then you need to set up ground rules and very very clear guidelines for the usage of your car. WHEN she can use it (certain days of the week? certain hours of the day only?), WHERE she can drive it (just in town? to work and school?), her curfew when she has it, etc. Make sure she knows that there is no compromise. Tell her IF you are willing to help her save. Can you afford to match a certain percentage of whatever she saves so she has more buying power? It takes FOREVER to save up for a car when you're only making minimum wage....maybe she'll be more motivated to save if she feels like it can happen faster.

    Answer by laadeedah at 4:09 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

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  • You should also tell her NOW if she'll be able to take that car to college. Maybe knowing that she'll have nothing to drive in the near future will be motivation for her to buy something.

    Answer by laadeedah at 4:10 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

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  • my parents had a car that i would drive when i got my license at 16 they had 3 cars. but it wasnt mine and i didnt pay insurance so i could only use it when they let me. i wasnt allowed to go alot of places until i was 18. and a bunch of teens in a car is bound to be trouble and a distraction to the driver

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:14 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

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  • My son worked a summer job when he was 15 and bought his own truck. My husband and I pay for the insurance and gas- only for school, not to go out with friends. If he wants to go out, he has to pay for his own gas. He actually bought his truck before he was legal to drive on his own. But he knew when that time came he wanted his own vehicle. He is now 17 and has had 3 trucks- all he bought on his own (from summer jobs). I will continue to pay for insurance and gas as long as he's in school. Once school is done, he better be able to pay for it on his own.

    Answer by BrendaMomOf3 at 2:30 AM on Mar. 13, 2009

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  • Do not feel guilty. Make her work for her own car. Don't match the price make her earn it. There is no way in h**l I'd let my 16 year old go an hour and a half from home with friends in the car. She wants to go she needs her own car, her own gas money and money to pay for the insurance.

    Answer by AmericanChild82 at 7:39 AM on Mar. 13, 2009

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