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Any other adoptees find a member(s) of their birth family?

I am an adoptee that found my birth family and just want to know if other moms found theres and how was it for you to find them.


Asked by cotweety32 at 4:04 PM on Apr. 2, 2009 in Adoption

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Answers (8)
  • I run an adoption reunion group where adoptees and birth mothers can share issues, vent, ask questions, celebrate and talk about the issues and emotions of reunion. You don't have to be a member to read or post. Please stop by :) http://www.cafemom.com/group/14715  Adoptive moms are welcome too although we don't have many.


    Answer by onethentwins at 7:52 PM on Apr. 2, 2009

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  • Yep. My sis and I was adopted when I was 3 and she was 5. We found {actually our uncle} our birth mother when I was 13. My adopted mother did not like it whatsoever, come to find out she was painting a bad picture about our birth mother from the start until I still don't know whose really telling the truth. Here's the kicker my adoptive mom's older brother was married to my birth father's sister. No one said shit until later on down the line. It was something about her that made me cling to her all those years and my sis and I couldn't put our finger on it. We knew she was super nice to us. Seem like she was crying most of the visit. But my birth mother and I are close and we do keep in touch. She stays in MD.

    Answer by diamondmamma at 4:12 PM on Apr. 2, 2009

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    Answer by cotweety32 at 4:39 PM on Apr. 3, 2009

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  • I'm still searching but there are adoptee groups here on CafeMom and a lot of us that have found our birth families with a variety of results. PM me if you need help finding them - it is good to be able to talk with others who have "been through it" even if the outcomes are different.

    Answer by PortAngeles1969 at 8:18 PM on Apr. 3, 2009

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  • Thank you for all suport you guys and I enjoy hearing everybodys storys .

    Answer by cotweety32 at 12:36 AM on Apr. 5, 2009

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  • I found my biological mother 20 years ago. She drinks heavily. Very bad. I had some very tough times with this issue and eventually had to quit contact with her. I got a great sis out of the whole thing tho! Better to know if alcoholism is in the family so you can be a bit careful too. Esp. when my dad is also- so I have environmental and inherited with that situation.

    Answer by MaryEllen2002 at 8:47 AM on Apr. 7, 2009

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  • I just found this question which couldn't be at a better time! My brother actually found me....well they found my parents they are not my birth parents but they have had me since birth....he found my parents and I'm meeting him tomorrow! I'm so nervous! I will feel you in!

    Answer by lisalspence at 10:34 PM on Jul. 13, 2009

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  • I found my Birthmom at the age of 28 I was dating a guy after my divorce, we went to Oklahoma for a Ren Faire. We were meeting up with a couple of women who he had been friends with for years. At that time I honestly didn't care if you liked me or not. Case of if you don't like me, bite me. But when I laid eyes on the women everyone called Mumsy, I was scared out of my mind that she wasn't going to like me. Come to find out, the other women was her sister. I spent the entire weekend with her and her sister. We became very close over the following year. After my telling her the stories, about my adoption, medical history things like that. She freaked out. She had been told that my twin (who we still have not found) and I were still born. She never got to lay eyes on us. We went in for a DNA test... and she's been the biggest part of my life since.

    Answer by gypsysparrow at 12:13 AM on Jul. 24, 2010

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