What should I do if I suspect my son is a bully?

What is his love language? What does he love and what are his skills and talents? He needs to feel loved (yes you love him but he needs to feel it. If he needs affection and you give him lots of verbal affirmation, it may be missing the mark for example)

Does he get any sort of problem solving help at school or home, or discipline/ consequence when he is being hurtful to others?

a lot of that comes from kids feeling like they can control situations. they feel like its their right to do so. i am not questioning your parenting at all so just here me out, but be sure that hes not the one making decisions at home. i noticed when i worked in daycare that the kids that made the decisions at home were the ones that tried to control others in the class. he needs to know that he is equal amongst everyone, except for adults of course. youll have to really stand your ground and make it a point to discuss with him his equality amongst the other kids. he will start to learn it, it may take a while but its all about patience. also try the good ole fashioned "how would you feel". talk to him about how he would react if someone treated him like that

Kids that bully usuallycome from two categories. Either they've been bullied themselves or there is an organic problem. My sister was a bully from hell, turns out she had excessively high testosterone levels. MY bff son is a bully, he was bullied bad for being fat. He lost the weight and now is being a bully himself.

Talk to him, really talk. Counseling could be the answer. Oddly, most bullys have low self esteem themselves.

I don't have all the answers but I can give you something from my personal experience. One of my kids was a real bully at home, but not anywhere else. I tried many things as far as discipline went. I tried having her make it up to the other person. apologize, get punished (time in room, time without tv, time without toys), do a chore, etc. Nothing worked. Then, I tried spending more time with her one on one. It worked wonders. This kid just needs more individual attention in our family, and thrives when she gets it. I don't give the time alone as a reward. But when she gets time alone, her behavior is much better. Hope this helps.

I do not really know how to deal with bullying, but I can give you some websites to visit. Try checking out Nogginpower2. They have excellent readings on Bullying Prevention, Discipline, Getting Great Grades and Making New Friends. I checked Nogginpower2 myself, and I thought it was very helpful. If this fails, you should also visit this website called radKIDS.org. From my perspective, this website has excellent programs that could help teach your child discipline and self-confidence. I even learned that radKIDS has numerous resources that can help you cope with your child's behavioral problem. Thank you and good luck.

Usually, if a kid is bullied, he will bully too. It doesn't have to be in school, maybe your son was somehow bulllied by his dad or an older sibling, this makes them turn around and bully somebody weaker then them. I would sit down and have a one on one chat with him, get down to the problem and tell him that if he doesn't stop he will end up in jail. Scare him a little bit, nowdays we have to use whatever means we have left.