How long do you let your baby cry when doing the CIO method?

My son is 9 month old and he still wakes up after 2 am every hour or so.. He sleeps in his room since 2,5 m. when he was about 6 month i started CIO and after couple days it worked great! He started fall asleep by himself and slept pretty good through night. Then we went on vacation for a month overseas.. Things have changed dramatically! He doesn't want sleep anymore, unless I carry him, so after a week since we came back i started let him cry again. Hi didn't sleep after 1,5 hour of crying! We tried it four nights on the row , it's been hell and then we just gave up..

We're doing our best - bedtime routine, bath, and all this, we play white noise CD, but every night between 1 and 2 am he wakes up, i feed him and then he's up every hour or less till 6 -6.30 am. I am desperate, please, help!!!

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Tanusha32

Asked by Tanusha32 at 12:14 AM on Nov. 18, 2008 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (15)
  • Wow, that's crazy! I would make sure that when you're doing the CIO method, that you are occassionally stepping in there to check on him. Go in every 15-20 minutes to rearrange him and make sure everything's alright.

    My daughter did this a lot...she always wanted a bottle at night (which I never gave her!) so instead of putting formula or juice in it, I'd give her about 2 ounces of cold water. She'd usually suck on that and fall bask to sleep. I think the coolness helped calm her too. When they cry like that they get hot and wear themselves out.

    Just stick with whatever routine you're trying to get him on...don't give up. It will get better soon!
    ReneeK3

    Answer by ReneeK3 at 12:17 AM on Nov. 18, 2008

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  • Thanks, ReneeK3! I did check on him about every 20 min, but it did even worse - once he saw me, crying got much more intensive, so i just peeked through the open door. I also agree with you about water - we try now to stop night feedings by offering lil bit water, but then he's up in 30-40 min, or hour and i think poor baby's hungry, and i feed him .
    Tanusha32

    Answer by Tanusha32 at 12:26 AM on Nov. 18, 2008

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  • Personally, I think the long vacation screwed him up. Babies thrive on structure and schedule. being in a strange place with strange smells probably threw all that off balance. I think it will just take more time to get him back to where he was before you left.
    MammaMia72

    Answer by MammaMia72 at 12:29 AM on Nov. 18, 2008

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  • 1.5 hours of crying??!!! I would love for you to cry that hard for that long. How would that feel? Please read about CIO and how to implement it, if you are so intent on using this archaic method (which is the only sleep training method with proven negative consequences). CIO does NOT mean leave baby in the room to cry for an extended period of time. It is recommended by CIO advocates to stop the CIO if crying persists for 45 min. Also know that CIO is NOT to be used during teething (which very well may be your reason for your wakeful child).

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:06 AM on Nov. 18, 2008

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  • Seriously, all this forcing children to "deal with it" at such young ages is really disheartening! It's a good thing if your child wants to feel secure in your arms! Sorry if that puts a crimp in your love life or you're too tired to go to work the next day, but that's just ONE of the many trials and tribulations that comes with being a parent! Your child is only NINE MONTHS OLD! Geez!!!!

    Common sense is the ONLY "method" that needs to be implemented. Did your mother or grandmother get their common sense from a book? I'm thinking, no! They did what they had to do, to the best of their abilities, making plenty of mistakes along the way, and guess, what, it all worked out in the end. Seriously, because YOU weren't put to sleep using the "CIO" method, are you somehow worse off?

    Rewriting common sense almost always backfires!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:48 AM on Nov. 18, 2008

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  • OK. Clearly something isn't working and it might be teething or being messed up from the trip or baby might be going through a growth spurt. Unfortunately, CIO is not working for you at this time. I would give baby a bottle the first time. The second time, tell him that you are leaving a bottle or sippy of water and show him where you put it. This might help. My youngest always responded to being treated like a big kid; it's just who he is. You might also want to introduce a blanket or a special animal and wrap it in your dirty tshirt from the day - it will smell like you and be comforting. After a short time, the dirty shirt will not be necessary and your little one will have something to hug for comfort.
    balagan_imma

    Answer by balagan_imma at 10:36 AM on Nov. 18, 2008

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  • I'd NEVER do such a thing to a baby. I've had 5 kids and not once have any of them been forced to cry alone and wonder why I wasn't coming to help them.
    Pauline3283

    Answer by Pauline3283 at 11:13 AM on Nov. 18, 2008

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  • Thanks to everyone for comments, i really appreciated them. For those, who by some reason, see me as a heartless monster - before I started CIO, tried regular things - bath, song, rocking in the chair. He sleeps, but after a while he's standing in the crib, looking for me. So, i thought, to stop him from being awake at night he needs to learn to fall asleep by himself, so did say a book, recommended by our ped. That's was the main reason, not my comfort!
    That's all messed up by trip, and he's teething as well now.. I like the idea about leaving my dirty tshirt, though.
    Tanusha32

    Answer by Tanusha32 at 11:34 AM on Nov. 18, 2008

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  • The mother isn't asking to be attacked for using CIO. All of you mothers need to get off your high horses. She is asking for ADVICE. If you have none to give, then why answer??? I wouldn't be suprised if you all were co-sleeping parents.

    To the OP, I am sorry you are being attacked on here. Now to try and help you with your question, it def soundsl iek the traveling has screwed up his sleep patterns. I would give your pedi a call and tell him all you have been doing and see if he/she can offer you some advice.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:40 AM on Nov. 18, 2008

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  • i did this when my daughter was 7 months. the best advise i can give you is
    A: once you decide to do it, do it. everytime you give in you have to start over.
    B: start it with the first nap of the day. that way by time bed time rolls around it is the 2 or 3 time they have been put to bed.
    when i did this it worked for me. the hardest is at night. a good website is
    www.sleepsence.net
    she is great!
    i am also sorry you are being attacked. i had to do this with my dd because the lack of sleep was starting to put a strain on my marriage. and to all those who are so against this. we do not neglect our children when doing this, we a simply teaching them to self sooth so that everyone in the house, expecially the baby, can get better nights of sleep. it is a very healthy thing to do.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:28 PM on Nov. 18, 2008

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