Do you have advice on blending families?

I was a single mom to a girl 4. my husband has been a single father of his two kids a girl 12 and a son 9. when we were dating everything seemed okay now that we are married things are crazy his kids don't listen to me or ignore me completely. he has talked to them several times we have sat down and discussed it as a family everthing is good for two days then we have to remind them to help again. it is very frustrating. my daughter is still young enough and has never had a dad that she listens and does very asked be her from my husband. i just need advice on what i can do to make things run better in our household.

  • SHARE THIS QUESTION:
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:13 PM on Nov. 26, 2008 in Relationships

This question is closed and filed in the CafeMom Encyclopedia.
Answers (6)
  • Keep doing what you are doing...My family is blended and my fiance and I talk to them all together. My daughter is 4 his are 6. Be consistant, don't stop the teamwork....
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 1:17 PM on Nov. 26, 2008

    Credits: 784 Level 12
    Votes up:0 Votes down:0
  • Pray sister pray! ;) They may be influenced by the other parent. Just make them feel welcomed and not like outsders. Over time they will see you and your daughter are not the enemy or a threat. Treat the equally. Don't let them separate you two. Set the rules and bounderies. Stick together and communicate alot.
    JCRestoredme

    Answer by JCRestoredme at 1:22 PM on Nov. 26, 2008

    Credits: 291 Level 9
    Votes up:0 Votes down:0
  • Check out this book my husband just got (after 4 years of attempting to have a successful relationship with my son)
    The Stepfamily Survival Guide by Natalie Nichols Gillespie
    I really like it.
    chickadee8654

    Answer by chickadee8654 at 3:20 PM on Nov. 26, 2008

    Credits: 0 Level 1
    Votes up:0 Votes down:0
  • Maybe get you family into counseling. If anyone of you have a hard time gettting your feelings out, this will give everyone a "safe place" to do so in a respectful and understanding manner. But I also agree with Danee to keep doing what you're doing and remain a UNITED FRONT. GL.

    LovingParent08

    Answer by LovingParent08 at 4:27 PM on Nov. 26, 2008

    Credits: 142 Level 6
    Votes up:0 Votes down:0
  • I never thought blending 2 families would be so difficult. My husband said we were in it together, his children are so good & they would love me, I got lost in the fairytale. His 13yr old daughter arrived from a different state to live with us (first time I met her in person, only talked to her & her younger brother on the phone, sent gifts, etc.). The honeymoon was over the moment she arrived. She was a typical 13yr old, mad at me for taking her father, mad that her father worked bad hours & she was left with me & my 12yr old son. She treated us like crap, called me ugly, stupid, did what she wanted, told her fam how awful we were & everytime I told her dad what she did he sided with her and got angry with me. She is his princess & can do no wrong, he doesn't care who she hurts or that we are supposed to be the parents & a team. Long story short, that was a year ago & its taken us a yr to recover (as well as possible). Sighhh
    lsdavis

    Answer by lsdavis at 2:29 PM on Oct. 7, 2009

    Credits: 0 Level 1
    Votes up:0 Votes down:0
  • Lucky u lol I have absolutly NO HELP but my step kids father not counting he is on the road all the time and I am raising these kids with noones help and there mom lost them to dcfs wich is why I have them...
    thismomrocks4

    Answer by thismomrocks4 at 7:47 PM on May. 7, 2010

    Credits: 13 Level 3
    Votes up:0 Votes down:0