Do you keep your kids away from your in-laws?

i have awful inlaws and they havent seen my son in 6months and i dont care if its a year or 5. they need to grow up and act like mature adults before they get to see my son. i dont need them being racist towards what i am around him because thats apart of him too.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:24 AM on Dec. 13, 2008 in Relationships

This question is closed and filed in the CafeMom Encyclopedia.
Answers (14)
  • if theyre being discriminating towards him then screw them they dont want his race they dont get him. They'll either get over it or never see him. Its their choice.
    collegemom1007

    Answer by collegemom1007 at 3:31 AM on Dec. 13, 2008

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  • Well if they are saying racial things then to me that's giving up their rights to see him. I wouldn't allow that. people need to get over petty differences and grow up
    MarlyeGirl

    Answer by MarlyeGirl at 4:05 AM on Dec. 13, 2008

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  • My in laws love my daughter to death and would never say anything bad regarding her, however they do sometimes act very sneaky and manipulative and play back stabbing games and so on. I have never really intentionally kept my daughter from them, but if we end up not talking for a few weeks or so then they dont see or hear of my daughter during that time.
    asholan_07

    Answer by asholan_07 at 7:29 AM on Dec. 13, 2008

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  • My fiance's parents haven't seen our son in atleast 6 months. When we were living with them we got into a fight about us not giving them money we didn't have and they chose to keep weed growing on the back porch instead of our son and us living there. Sadly they get to see him today even though I really don't want them to because it's his first birthday.
    bassyentihw

    Answer by bassyentihw at 8:53 AM on Dec. 13, 2008

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  • I think that your SO needs to talk to them about their behavior. If they want to see your child yet they are being racist they need to figure out what is more important to them. A child is a beautiful thing and can change people. In any case I did keep my daughter from my inlaws for over 3 months one time because she fell down their stairs and they refused to buy a baby gate. I could not believe that it took them so long after the horror of watching her fall to get a gate.
    ladywhynott

    Answer by ladywhynott at 10:25 AM on Dec. 13, 2008

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  • I never kept my children away from my in-laws. They were my husband's parents, and for that reason alone, they were worthy of my respect. It is not your job to punish them for their bad behavior, and I can tell you for sure that it will come back to bite you if you keep doing it. Your husband will come to resent you, and there will be other problems as well.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 11:26 AM on Dec. 13, 2008

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  • Some of my inlaws aren't the best of people either. My husband's made countless attempts and working things out with them, but it always just turns bad. He's finally given up -- the ball is in their court now to try and make ammends.

    My husband & I have 4 children. They are 22 months, 5, 6, & 10 yrs old. My husband has 5 siblings.

    One of his siblings have never seen any of our kids. One sister saw the oldest once when he was a few months old. Two other siblings saw the oldest once when he was about 2 yrs old. And the last sister has seen our kids twice, I believe, the last time being about a year ago.

    His mom has seen our kids about 6 times. The last time was about a year ago.
    His father has seen my oldest son once, when he was about 2. He has never met our other children.
    Laura1229

    Answer by Laura1229 at 12:12 PM on Dec. 13, 2008

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  • Any time anyone is abusive towards me or my DH, they do not get to see my child, regardless of if they are relatives or not. And racism doesn't fly by me, either. They can think whatever they want, but if they say anything negative about another ethnic background, I'm gone.
    My MIL is racist, but knows not to say anything around me, esp since I'm 1/2 black. She actually told me when DH and I were dating that she worried about grandchildren by me coming out brown.
    My own mother will probably never meet my children because she was abusive to me when I was a child and is not remorseful of her actions. She doesn't deserve to see my child.
    I think that anytime anyone is abusive to parents, the consequence of that is that they don't get the privilege of seeing the grand kids.
    nwdeserangel

    Answer by nwdeserangel at 12:34 PM on Dec. 13, 2008

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  • I am a grandparent, so when I first read the title of your question, I thought I'd put in my two cents on behalf of the grandparents....but after reading your question I totally agree with you. No child needs to be around that. I'd say keep them away forever!!
    robinann5

    Answer by robinann5 at 12:43 PM on Dec. 13, 2008

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  • Well, I've kept my MOTHER away from her only grandchildren for the past 5 years (they're almost 7 and 5)..because she is a LIAR, a DRUNK, and a diagnosed SOCIOPATH. She is a spiteful biatch, and does not set a very good example.

    Last I checked, my husband and I are fully capable of providing a beautiful, loving and stable home for our children. She just added way too much tension, and it made me snippy with my husband, so I decided to cut the apron strings!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:59 PM on Dec. 13, 2008

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