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I'm having a hard time with my 16 year old

Posted by on May. 24, 2010 at 11:19 PM
  • 7 Replies

My husband got a new job in a bigger City and he and my oldest moved there last month.  My youngest wants to move but more towards the end of the summer. He wants to hang out with his friends.  I work as a police dispatcher and am staying put until October,  that's when my 10 years are up.  My youngest wants to move before school starts but wants to dictate when I take him.  I have vacation time starting tomorrow until June 8th and I need to move him now.  I won't have anymore time off during the summer so if he doesn't go now he won't be able to move until I go in October.  He doesn't want that either because he doesn't want to transfer to a new school in the middle of a semester.  Now the time has come for us to leave tomorrow. I go pickup the u haul trailer at 9am and he's fighting me every step of the way.  He refuses to pack his room, I've been doing it.  Now he's telling me he's not going at all and I don't know what to do...I'm afraid I won't be able to get him in the car tomorrow...HELP!!

Am I being unreasonable by making him move tomorrow???

by on May. 24, 2010 at 11:19 PM
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Replies (1-7):
Wyndi
by on May. 25, 2010 at 12:07 AM

 I can see both sides. You want to do it now so you can get him moved and see your husband and other child. Your son on the other hand wants time with his friends before he moves.  So how about a compromise, (mind you this is just a suggestion) let him have one more week with his friends then you all head up to the new city. Also have him help pack or he will find himself moving with just the stuff on his back and he will have to wait until October for the rest of it.

neng999
by on May. 25, 2010 at 3:51 AM

help him realize the importance of the word FAMILY....it is the one we should prioritized...pray...

myboysmom99
by on May. 25, 2010 at 5:30 PM

If at all possible, don't interrupt his schooling. I don't know what the distance is between the 2 homes but maybe his dad can take a day to pick him up or maybe he can fly alone since he's old enough. You want to make sure that he hasn't missed too many days of school or he won't be able to go onto the next grade. If he's ok to miss, make him go now which seems to be the most convenient. Perhaps your husband and your other son can have some fun activities already planned for him when he gets there to make it an incentive to want to go. It's always hard leaving friends. I had to move with a military family every year but always made new friends quickly. Hope it works out. Let us know.

kathy210
by on May. 26, 2010 at 9:15 AM

Is it possible to move most of his stuff to your new place and keep just his essentials for the summer and have him travel to the new home toward the end of summer so he can start school at the new place but stay put so it doesn't interrupt this years school.  Maybe he can sleep on the couch and keep just toiletries and a weeks worth of clothes so he just has a suitcase worth to move later.

Jasminepoohbear
by on May. 26, 2010 at 2:46 PM
Thanks ladies for the advice and I'm glad to say the move went off without a hitch. I gave him sometime to say goodbye to his friends and last night when he was unpacking he was all smiles because this room is so much bigger then his old one. I'm hoping now that he's here he will adjust and really like it.
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jabs54
by on May. 26, 2010 at 3:12 PM

 Oh dear.  I can see his side of it but you are the parent.  I think it's time for daddy to come back and take control ;)

MrsBLB
by on May. 26, 2010 at 5:10 PM

I see both sides too.  Is there a way to find middle ground at all? 

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