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my son is 18, and always ask can girlfriend spend the night

Posted by on Jun. 16, 2010 at 6:47 PM
  • 27 Replies

whenever my son's girlfriend come over, he always ask can she spend the night. I say no because she is only 16 going on 17,Do you think I'm wrong?

by on Jun. 16, 2010 at 6:47 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mwells0714
by on Jun. 16, 2010 at 6:50 PM

I certainly don't think you're wrong.....I for one probably wouldn't let my son have his girlfriend stay the night until she is atleast 18.  Allowing that would just open yourself up to a whole new world of problems......And besides how would her parents feel if they knew she was spending the night at your place?

Momof5Teens67
by on Jun. 16, 2010 at 7:02 PM

I think every household and every family/parent has to make those decisions to fit THEIR household rules and philosophies etc. 

IF (not saying you are or not bc I don't know) but IF you are ok with it and just worried about the girl, then I would talk to her parents and let them make the decision about their daughter. 

Once my kids are 18 they can even have their own room with their significant other in MY house HOWEVER I can absolutely see why you would be concerned when his girlfriend is a minor, with some family's they could even charge him with statutory rape even if she is willing and that would be really sad. 

Just be careful.  

wallmom1
by on Jun. 16, 2010 at 7:20 PM

As the mom to a 17 yo girl I say, NO she can not stay!!!  Why does he keep asking?  I would just say that it isn't going to happen so stop asking.  That would make me just as mad!

You have to do what you feel is right for you at your house.  I agree with you, and I know that some families feel like it isn't a big deal.  To me it is.  I don't live with my head in the sand, but that doesn't mean I approve or that it is ok to do in my house.

Autumn_M
by on Jun. 16, 2010 at 8:10 PM

 

Quoting wallmom1:

As the mom to a 17 yo girl I say, NO she can not stay!!!  Why does he keep asking?  I would just say that it isn't going to happen so stop asking.  That would make me just as mad!

You have to do what you feel is right for you at your house.  I agree with you, and I know that some families feel like it isn't a big deal.  To me it is.  I don't live with my head in the sand, but that doesn't mean I approve or that it is ok to do in my house.

 exactly

rkoloms
by on Jun. 16, 2010 at 8:56 PM

Your house, your rules! If your son does not like the rules, he is old enough to sign a lease.

Robin in Chicago

MomofTeenYikes
by on Jun. 16, 2010 at 9:10 PM

 

Absolutely NOT!  Under the law she's a minor and he's an adult.  He could be in some big trouble if the girlfriend gets dumped, etc.  I love the response that someone wrote tell him once and if he doesn't get it, sign a lease.

Don't forget it's your house, your the parent, its your rules.  Good luck.

 

momofne
by on Jun. 16, 2010 at 9:10 PM

And I'm sure you laughed hysterically when he did : ) No you are not wong by any means. Unless there was a dire emergency (like she got kicked out and had no where else to go) then no way.

atlmom2
by Susie on Jun. 16, 2010 at 9:50 PM

I might let my kids have boyfriends over if there is a reason for it and only after everyone is 18, but my girls know NEVER, even if they are 30 will they sleep together in my home if they are not married.  Just our rules and my girls already know that and do not think we are wrong for thinking that way.  I dated their dad at 18 and 19 and yes, some nights I spent the night at my, to be in laws house, but NEVER ever did I sleep with him until we were married. 

GibbyB
by on Jun. 16, 2010 at 10:24 PM

No, you are not wrong.   It is good to set your house rules.  When he is on his own and paying the bills he can can create his house rules and do what he wants in his own space...and pay the potential consequences of his behaviors.  If I was the mother of the girlfriend I would be very unhappy to find my daughter got pregnant in the home of the boyfriend and his mother gave permission to sleep togehter.

.Holly.
by on Jun. 16, 2010 at 10:29 PM

Agree.

Quoting MomofTeenYikes:


Absolutely NOT!  Under the law she's a minor and he's an adult.  He could be in some big trouble if the girlfriend gets dumped, etc.  I love the response that someone wrote tell him once and if he doesn't get it, sign a lease.

Don't forget it's your house, your the parent, its your rules.  Good luck.



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