12 yo wants run away from father's house (PIOG) (update in blue)
I have son who lives with his father in CA. There's been a lot going on over the years. I went out there this past week to visit and learned some interesting things. All this week my son has been calling me about dad's gf being on his case about everything and grounding him from going outside for something I think could have been handled differently. I got a call last night stating once again dad's gf is on his case about something. He wants to runaway from them. He made it clear that he doesn't want to live there. He even gave me a list of things last weekend to combat dad on in court. I just listened and wrote it down. Currently, I am trying to build a case here already to regain custody. This is based on behavior from father over the last 10 years. I finally gained some courage to fight back. I talked to someone about doing it without the attorney. In the meantime, because courts are slow, I need to figure out how to detour him from just taking off, I understand that kids get upset about things parents do rather its grounding or whatever. I have 3 teens that live here. I have told the father years ago that his tactic of trying to destroy the relationship between my son and I is going to backfire on him. This is as far as the degrading comments, lowering my authority and basically treating the gf the like she is the mother and I am just here. I have also had visitation denied and when he is grounded from his phone and going anywhere, visitation and phone priviledges are also used to keep him from me also. I have also said that I would take him for the summer to see if it helps when they were having issues in their relationship and said that he was reason. This was a few months ago. He used the court order which he uses so frequently that I decided to pull it out and read it again. It does say that things can be change temporarily through mutual written consent. They take the phrase about neither party changing the child's state of residence to mean that he can't leave the state. I have tried explaining it and its not working. Anyway, I need to figure out a way to detour this. In a normal parental situation I could talk to father to see what's going on. This isn't normal, so I am a lost. I talk to him some last night and told him that I will find out what options we have. I also told him that running will make the situation worse. I am still concerned about the situation. I am really not sure what to do here.
Last night my son text me again telling me he's done with all of it. He asked me some questions about the police being called. He was being kind of vague about stuff, so I had my daughter text him to find out what's going. He told her that he's being treated like a slave and Janie threatened to break his face and his legs. Not too mention some other things, I called the police to have them go check. I got a call back from him crying after they left saying that they didn't do anything. He also said that father took his phone away and they said that he has it good there. I called the police back and they said there was no basis for concern. They told me that its normal for a parent to take a phone away from a child. I don't what's going on here. I do know that I have heard things going on myself. I going to have to go through the legal channels to do something about it since it looks like no one else is doing anything.