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My 14 year old dd is boy crazy!!!!

Posted by on Aug. 24, 2010 at 6:45 PM
  • 11 Replies
my 14 year old is boy crazy! And she likes a bad boy with a bad reputation. I told her and him that she can't date him period. What do you think? Should I mind my business some or keep on her. 14 is young and with what hear some of these girls are doing...scary!
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by on Aug. 24, 2010 at 6:45 PM
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Replies (1-10):
shell81
by on Aug. 24, 2010 at 6:55 PM

 She is 14 NO you don't have to mind your own business. She is to young to date IMO and you have a right to tell her what she can do she is under 18!

                                           ~Shell~
Group Owner Of - Tween Titans
Group Admin To - CafeMom Group Resource Center

ame4c
by Bronze Member on Aug. 24, 2010 at 7:15 PM

 My son is 14 and is not allowed to date.  He has a girlfriend, but they don't date.  I have thought about letting them go to the movies or something, but it would be chapperoned (meaning I would be with him). 

My son tried saying I was over protective and I didn't trust him.  I told him, "It's not you I don't trust.  It's your hormones.  Hormones can cause you to do crazy things before you think about it. A lot of adults have a hard time with it as well. So until you are old enough to deal with the conciqences, you will be chapperoned."

I've met his girlfriend (also 14) and she's very sweet, but no dating until he's 16, unless I'm by his side.

momromtheheart
by on Aug. 24, 2010 at 7:24 PM

you're asking should u mind your business some??? She IS your business!! you told her that she can't date him period. stick 2 what u said...andhugs yes it is scary!!!!!!!!!!!!!

juliX4
by Bronze Member on Aug. 24, 2010 at 7:31 PM
My oldest was boy crazy also and she liked the bad boys who were older!! It drove her dad crazy! What I did may not work for everyone but I let her have small amounts of freedom with this until I could trust her. I kept the lines of communication open and let her tell me about everything (remember those giddy feelings when that special boy spoke to you? And that first kiss? Lol) I told her my fears and objections. I knew where her heart was and she had already proven to make pretty good choices. It worked for us. When she saw I didnt judge and was excited for her she told me more. I also used her friends as examples of why you dont do certain things and there were plenty of examples. Now my next two? They are not nearly as boy crazy so they are much easier on that front :) Good luck! Its a bumpy road
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Momof5Teens67
by on Aug. 24, 2010 at 7:53 PM

 When our girls were that age and like a boy a lot, regardless of what we thought of him, we didn't let them go on dates alone BUT we did invite the boy over to our house A LOT, for dinner,  for when we rented movies, for when we played games, for when we went out to dinner or on a family outing somewhere.  etc etc etc.

This helped us get to know the real him better and he got to know us and also respect us more. 

In some of the cases if we met his parents and trusted and liked them then we let our daughter go to their house with the parents to do things with his family.

My mom and dad hated my boyfriend when I was 14 and that just drove an even bigger wedge btw me and them and drove me closer and more loyal to him.

When we DID have any concerns about any boy any of our girls liked, we would let her know in a calm and careful way so she wouldnt feel defensive of him or like we were picking on him.  We were always nice and inviting to any boy they dated including those we were concerned about.

MrsBLB
by on Aug. 24, 2010 at 11:44 PM

You are the mom.  You make the decisions.  She listens, and hopefully gets where you are coming from.   *hugs* 

tweenmom
by on Aug. 25, 2010 at 12:04 PM

I also have a 14 year old and have done the same as Mom5tTeens67 has done.  We have had the same boy with our daughter for the past 2 1/2 years!  We have gone on vacations with his family, outings and alot of time at our home.  Both have been very open and honest with us.  Now with high school started the boy has been forced by his mother to break up with my daughter and meet other girls.  They continue to be together at school but no more outings after school.  It was simpler when they were younger but not hormones got in the way and we have told her no dating him until she is 16.  Its very hard when he has liked her since 4th grade and still continues to be by her side every day so no one else will have a chance until he can date.  It is very much our business.  We have been around longer and no more than they do even though our kids think we don't.  Just keep a open communication going with her and let her know why you are doing the things you are doing  are for her own safety.  Good luck

Taynhannahsmom
by on Aug. 25, 2010 at 2:37 PM

I think all the mom's out here that think they can control whether their teen dates or not are just naive. Someone also mentioned that they would chaperone their 14 yr old on a date? Really? That is sad.

sassy43082
by on Aug. 25, 2010 at 3:31 PM

I have one thing to tell you.... My daughter liked the bad boy too and I found out this summer that they had sex.. She is 15 yrs old... I am so heart broken because her and i have dicussed so much until I was blue in the face only for her to have sex.... So I am going to tell you to continue to be on her until she loses the thought of ever being his girlfriend...

loopycare
by on Aug. 25, 2010 at 4:00 PM

I know a lot of girls around here get pregnant at 13 and 14.  Stick to your guns, girl.

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