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My daughter warned me...

Posted by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 10:23 AM
  • 11 Replies

My soon to be 16yo ds is a freshman in HS and is into sports. He's on the football team and on the wrestling team(he's really good at this and is going to Regionals this weekend). Since he's been doing sports, he's dropped 3 pants sizes and is developing muscles. My DD warned me that I need to watch out for my DS because he's a jock. I asked her what she meant and she said because of the girls, I said that DS wasn't really interested in girls yet he was too busy with sports. She said that may be true but the girls will be interested in HIM because he's one of the best on his teams.

My DH and I have already had the standard talks with him about sex and BC but  how do I help prepare him for the extra attention he's getting or will get? And just how far will these girls go, my DD wouldnt specify and I was never into jocks when I was in HS(back in the stone ages)


by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 10:23 AM
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Replies (1-10):
MamaJane
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 10:26 AM

 I think you need to let it lie until there really is a problem. Not all girls are like that.

mariC67
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 10:40 AM

I know that not all (probably most) girls are like that but the ones that ARE like that have me worried. And when it comes to sex I dont like letting things wait until there is a problem

Quoting MamaJane:

 I think you need to let it lie until there really is a problem. Not all girls are like that.



jo.smith
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 10:45 AM

 I don't think that you will have a problem.  If he isn't interested yet, it won't matter what the girls want.  Both my kids are way to involved with their sports, interests, and academics to have time for the opposite sex.  I have found that the kids who have too much time on their hands are the ones that are getting into trouble.

missvickey
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 11:00 AM
I would probably start a conversation with him sometime on how his being good in sports will attract the attention of more girls. That while the extra attention is nice he has to beware of girls that are interested in him for that reason alone. That when he decides to date that he chooses a girl because he likes her for WHO she is and not what she does. That it should be the same for the girl, she should like him for who he is, not simply because he's one of the best players. I'm not saying he shouldn't be friends with anyone, just that the person he chooses to date should be be special for who she is and that she should know he is too.
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elle31106
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 11:06 AM

My oldest had this 'problem' all through high school and my junior is also dealing with it. They just laugh it off. They were raised right and have a good head on their shoulders. They have never been interested in the 'quad queens'. What the kids in school call the girls who hang out where all the athletes assemble and hang out, just to be noticed. My boys never wanted to date anyone that only wanted to be with them to boost their personal popularity or someone who just wanted to wear their letterman jacket.

Not all girls are like that, and if you raised your son to see the value in a person and not the window dressing, then Im sure he will do fine.

san3
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 11:53 AM

I agree that it's best to prepare him if he hasn't had the experience before. There are just as many girls that will like him for who he really is as there are girls that will want to use him as a fast track to popularity. It's can be overwhelming and an interest can develop quickly. There are guys that can laugh it off and then there are guys that find the temptation hard to resist. It's better to be prepared.

amberdy
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 11:58 AM
I would just let it go unless you have never talked to him about sex before (which at 16 I hope you have already). My 16 is a junior and I have been talking with him about girls and sex for years.
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ZBandMom
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 1:22 PM

If you are concerned with it, have a little discussion with him to drive home the point about girls who will like him for WHAT he is (a jock) and girls who will like him for WHO he is and help him understand the difference between the 2.  After that he should be able to figure out the girls who like him for the person he is while off the mat and field and the girls who just want to be his arm candy.

02nana07
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 1:27 PM

 Just wait and see what happens he might surprise you. 

shell81
by on Feb. 9, 2011 at 11:04 PM

 All you can do is educate kids and keep lines of communication open!

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