How to punish my defiant, disrespectful 13 yr old BRAT?
To give you a little background, my ex & I have joint custody of my 13 yr old daughter, Katie. He lives about 3/4 of a mile from our house. I call him "Disney Dad" because he showers our daughter with expensive gifts.....she has had a cell phone since she was 7 yrs old. Naturally Katie gravitates to her dad.
Well, this morning we were leaving the house to do errands. I notice that Katie has on socks with CROCKS. There is 2 inches of snow on the ground outside! So I tell Katie to change shoes. She refuses. I insist. She refuses again. She then heads out to the garage and gets in the car. I open the car door and loudly tell her to go get other shoes on! She says no. So I tell her she's in big trouble for not listening to me, and I proceed to call her dad. He doesn't answer so I call my husband. I tell him what's going on and he asks to speak to Katie. I don't know what he said to her, but it got her moving in the direction of the house to switch shoes!
Currently I'm thinking I will make her go to bed at 8 o'clock, the same time as her 9 yr old brother. I really want to punish her a lot worse than that though...I don't think the early bedtime will really phase her. If she was smaller than me I would have considered taking her over my knee and whooping her ass for being so blatantly defiant and disrespectful towards me this morning, but unfortunately she is an inch taller already and a hefty 30 lbs. heavier than me! So whooping her ass isn't really an option....but I want to make her suffer. A LOT. The thing that really makes me even more angry is that when I picked her up from being at my friend's house for a couple of hrs (I went with my friend to the Dr. for some biopsy results) Katie still had her bad attitude, and she sat with her arms crossed which spoke volumes about her shitty disposition. She really does owe me an apology for being such a little bitch! I don't know if we are going to make it through these teen years....I really don't. :( Any good ideas for punishment?