Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

My 14yr old daughter's lack of sleep is affecting her school work.

Posted by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 10:11 AM
  • 15 Replies

Hi and thanks for the welcome. 

My daughter is 14, and has always had trouble sleeping.  Since she was a baby she never kept a "conventional" sleep schedule no matter how hard I tried to keep her in a routine.  Now that she has school and HAS to get up it just makes life around here miserable, especially for her.  She is in this cycle of not sleeping at night, going to school and sleeping when she comes home.  I know I should keep her up but after volleyball season, she has nothing to do after school.  Plus she is so tired I let her sleep. And it's too the point that it is affecting her school, cause some days I let her stay home. I know if I sent her she wouldn't be paying attention anyway.   

When it gets really bad she has told me she thinks about bad, negative stuff (like problems with friends, & family worries and she has told me she thinks of suicide)  which just aids in keeping her up.   We have a great relationship.  She does talk to me, and she has lots of friends,  but she doesn't have a best friend.  If she could get on a good sleep schedule I know she would feel better, and these thoughts would go away.  She doesn't drink caffeine, but she does take her shower at night. I have encouraged her to read, do puzzle books, and say the rosary.  None of it seems to help.

 Any input, from anyone with a child the same age, or problem would be appreciated.  Thanks for listening,

Wendy

by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 10:11 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Sunshine201
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 10:20 AM

Hi Wendy!

My daughter was dealing with the same problem....I took her to the doctor and they recommended she take some Melatonin (vitamin isle) and have a cup of Chamomile tea... Let me tell you it has worked tremendously.....She takes the Melatonin about 1/2 hour before bed and has her tea... within an hour or so she is sleeping peacefully.

momofne
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 10:23 AM

A few questions first:

When she's up all night what is she doing during this time?

Has she ever seen anyone for depression?


PurpleHazey
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 10:26 AM

I would say her sleep pattern is why off, she needs to sleep at night so that her grades will not be affected.

rmc1ra
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 10:31 AM

She needs to get on a regular schedule.  It will be rotton for a few days (so you may want to do it over spring break but ) if you keep her engaged in activities and things to do until about 1-2 hours before bed then give her 8-10 hours for sleep, after a few days she should be ok  if not then I would talk to a doctor. It is normal, unfortunately for young teens to obsess about the things that have gone on throughout the day, will go on the next day.  When my daughter is stressed about school, friends or school etc and she is having trouble relaxing/falling asleep I have her stop all electronics and read or listen to music before bed. We also purchased an alarm clock that has sleep sounds and the white noise helps tremendously for both of my kids. 

cege
by Bronze Member on Mar. 2, 2011 at 10:39 AM

I have a son with sleep issues.  Even though your daughter is tired when she gets home from school, letting her sleep right after school is probably negatively affecting her ability to sleep at night.  I'd let her relax for awhile but not sleep when she gets home.  Have her go to bed at a consistent time at night if you can and keep all electronics (tv, computer, videos) off for an hour before bedtime.  I would try Sunshine201's recommendation of melatonin.  And I'd also think about taking her to a counselor to talk about her anxiety issues.  The counselor may be able to give her some techniques to help her relax.

lucky2Beeme
by Gold Member on Mar. 2, 2011 at 10:42 AM

  My 1st thoughts were she see should her dr. Have a full physical to rule out anything. Is sounds like she might have depression.  Ask her dr about it. Ask about his thoughts on melatonin that another poster used for her child. I have not been through this with a child so I am totally grasping at straws. I hope you can find a way to get her to sleep on a more reg schedule.

wendywoo27
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 11:56 AM

Hi and thanks for your response

like the tea idea and there's really nothing to loose there. Also I have heard of the Melatonin, and I would like to keep her of medication as long as possible.  She is also a great little actress and takes after her dad by blowing a mole hill into a mountain, so I take away at least 25% cause I first and foremost give her the benefit of the doubt.  Either way I know there's a problem, I just cant put my finger on it.

I"ll let you know how the tea works!

Wendy

jo.smith
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 12:28 PM

 

Quoting lucky2Beeme:

  My 1st thoughts were she see should her dr. Have a full physical to rule out anything. Is sounds like she might have depression.  Ask her dr about it. Ask about his thoughts on melatonin that another poster used for her child. I have not been through this with a child so I am totally grasping at straws. I hope you can find a way to get her to sleep on a more reg schedule.

 My daughter has similar issues as yours, and my thoughts were the same as luckyeBeeme's.  I think that you should take her to a counselor to make sure the problem (or part of it) isn't depression, even if it isn't they can help her learn effective ways to deal with the anziety and negative thoughts.  My DD drinks Chamomille tea, but it still doesn't really help.  I am going to try the Melatonin to try and give her some relief.

wendywoo27
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 12:30 PM

I have to say it is nice to find out your not the only one with a problem, any problem, but sometimes it takes a smack in the head to ask for help.  I'm glad I did and like the ideas all of you had. 

I know she is depressed about her best friend. Even though she knows she can, and she does, talk to me about everything, she needs a peer. I feel just horrible for her. 

  I also realize she has way too much techno going on. I know she does turn her laptop off, tv. and music off and tries to sleep but when she cant I know she is talking to someone either texting or skyping. I'm going to have to talk to her about taking the laptop and it's going to be like telling her I have to amputate her arm. 

If you have any more natural remedies please forward them along. This was a good experience and it was nice meeting you all.  I'll keep you post from here and maybe I can return the favor in another post ;)

Wendy

02nana07
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 12:40 PM

 1st stop letting her take a nap,  make her stay up at least until 7 or 8 to start with.   Add an extra hour per week, that you make her stay up, until you get to the desired bedtime.   You could also try giving her melatonin at bedtime ask the dr how much but you can get it at any pharmacy over the counter.  It promotes quality sleep and helps you get to sleep. 

It sounds like she just has her sleep schedule off and until the naps stop it will not get corrected.  It will be rough the 1st few weeks but well worth it in the end.

GOOD LUCK

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)