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Should I send a text pretending to be my daughter?

Posted by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:08 AM
  • 28 Replies
KINDA LONG!!! My 14 yr old goes to her father's house every other weekend. About three months ago i was going through her txt msg and found one to him. she texted him and told him I said she couldn't come that weekend. When I confronted her she said she lied because she wanted to go shopping and didnt want to hurt his feeling. I had her call her dad and tell him that she lied and why. Well she broke down crying, he asked to speak to me and we argued for about 15 mins. When it was time for her to go back with him he txt her and told her he couldn't deal with me and my attitude so he will see her when she is 18 and can make her own choices. The problem is that was the first time I had spoken with him in over 2yrs, they call & txt each other so I dnt have to. We haven't seen each other in about a year. On friday I drop her off at an aunt house and he picks her up and he drops her off on Sunday and then I get her. Well this has been going on since early September. I know she's missing him and her half brothers and sisters. I'm tempted to send a txt to him (as her) asking him to come over. If hr says yes I would tell her what I did. If he says something negative she won't have to know? Should I or shouldnt I, can someone give me some advice on this matter?





** UPDATE **. Every time I talk to him we argue, we never see eye to eye, the other never wants to compromise. I'm planning a sit down with him later this week, wish me luck

Thanks everyone
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:08 AM
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Replies (1-10):
ImEllaGrace
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:12 AM
1 mom liked this

 Is there some way you could text him yourself or email him & let him know how hard this is on your daughter & how unreasonable he is being? If you two haven't talked or anything in two years then what's his deal? & why is he mad at you that your daughter lied to him about coming over? That's just plain ridiculous! If she told him that she lied to him because she chose to do something else then that's not your fault, he needs to be speaking with your daughter about that!

luckysevenwow
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:14 AM

I would call him up myself. Talk to his family see if they will help. The whole thing sounds childish to me.

Sunshine2plus2
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:15 AM

 Why is it you guys cant talk like adults?

I would not do that bc I guarantee he will find out its you and probably start more trouble!


Sunshine Proud mom to Garrett, Madison, Colt and Julissa
Awesome wife to Chuck since 08-15-09

Cindy18
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:22 AM
1 mom liked this

 Don't pretend to be her. That's childish.

Be a grown up and call him. Don't text. And find out what's going on. If he is still a jackass about things, tell him you are not standing in his way of seeing his daughter and you are sorry that HE is making these decisions but they are his decisions.

heartsnflowers
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:44 AM

What Cindy said..good advise..

Quoting Cindy18:

 Don't pretend to be her. That's childish.

Be a grown up and call him. Don't text. And find out what's going on. If he is still a jackass about things, tell him you are not standing in his way of seeing his daughter and you are sorry that HE is making these decisions but they are his decisions.


Not_A_Native
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 11:54 AM

Yep - don't do it.  Call him, tell him that it is HIS choice.  Tell him it was NOT you that did this before.  Talk to your daughter too - you think she's missing him, but in fact she may really not be.  I've btdt when I was a teenager.

woodswalker
by Bronze Member on Jan. 15, 2012 at 12:08 PM


Quoting Sunshine2plus2:

 Why is it you guys cant talk like adults?

I would not do that bc I guarantee he will find out its you and probably start more trouble!


tyfry7496
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 12:12 PM
1 mom liked this
This is amazing advice.

Quoting heartsnflowers:

What Cindy said..good advise..

Quoting Cindy18:

 Don't pretend to be her. That's childish.


Be a grown up and call him. Don't text. And find out what's going on. If he is still a jackass about things, tell him you are not standing in his way of seeing his daughter and you are sorry that HE is making these decisions but they are his decisions.


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mumsy2three
by Shauna on Jan. 15, 2012 at 12:46 PM

This.

Quoting Cindy18:

 Don't pretend to be her. That's childish.

Be a grown up and call him. Don't text. And find out what's going on. If he is still a jackass about things, tell him you are not standing in his way of seeing his daughter and you are sorry that HE is making these decisions but they are his decisions.


dresdenfan118
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 1:26 PM
2 moms liked this

I can't believe dad cut her off like that and tried to blame you for his decision.  Your child lied.  You set her straight.  Dad is mad at you?  Weird.  

He made a bad decision.  Don't compound the problem.  Do not impersonate your dd.  Most people probably wouldn't even consider doing something like this.  

Be honest with your dd about her dad's decision.  She lied.  She got caught.  She had to fess up.  The response of cutting her off  until she is 18 b/c dad can't deal with mom is way out of line.  It's like burning down a house because you need to fix the sink.  

Be honest with dad about how much his decison is hurting your dd.  Do whatever it takes to promote the best outcome for your kid, whatever you decide that to be.     

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