14 yr old son treats me like the plague at school events...

[jtlmom3]

Hi moms...I'm new to this and I need your help.  I am the mom of 3...Josh 17, Tommy 14, and Lily 8.  My problem is w/ Tommy.  I have really great relationships with all my kids and Tom and I are especially close.  He is sweet, loving and generally great to be around.  He is a freshman this year and is on the wrestling team.  Imake every attempt to go to sporting events and support all he does.  Ok for my problem...he  treats me like a leper (?spelling) at meets.  Believe me, I get it's the rare teenager that isn't embarrassed by his parents, but he won't even acknowledge me and today, walked away from me when I inquired whether he wanted me to get an even tee-shirt.  I was really embarrassed and hurt.  It was downright rude.  I spoke to him later and he had very little to say, just that it's embarrassing.  I barely speak to him.  I told him I don't have to come if he doesn't want me there, but he said he did.  I really feel bad...as I write out a huge check so he can go to Disney w/ the band during Spring break...  :-)

Help, please.

 

[atlmom2]

Sounds like a normal teen to me.  Sounds like he wants you there, but at a distance. 

[momofne]

Yeah it's like walking a tightrope sometimes.

Quoting atlmom2:

Sounds like a normal teen to me.  Sounds like he wants you there, but at a distance. 

[luvmia]

I understand how you feel. It is hurtful but you will be able to get through this. Have a conversation with your son and let him know that this is no way to treat your mother no matter who is around. It is disrespectful. And remind him that you are not only important to him when something is going wrong with him. Children sure know how to acknowledge us when trouble is brewing.

[02nana07]

 Sorry if mine treated me disrespectful I would not be writing them a check,  I would tell them I wouldn't want to embarrass them by sending my money to the band. 

I understand not wanting your parents around but there is no excuse for disrespect at any age.

I know others might say let it slide but if you do it will only get worse.

[luckysevenwow]

If I could not be treated with decency, I would not go. I wouldn't expect them to hang with me or shower me with hugs and kisses but come one there is no reason to be rude. If he wants you there then he should treat you with respect otherwise I don't need to be there.

[aktotx]

My son is 15 also a freshman and on the wrestling team.  He would never act like I wasn't there.  Wrestling is such a tight knit group of boys and most of the time I have 4-5 boys coming up and talking to me.  I would tell him if he wants to be disrespectful towards you then you won't be coming to his duels and that check for disney will be coming out of his savings.  

[Keiki123]

My kid to the same thing they just want to hang with there friend no us. I know how you feel it is embarrassing but there are a lot of us parent that are gioing thur the same thing. I have already raised two thur the teenage year and they have said that they are sorry for the way they acted as a teenager now if I can just get the other 4 thur thier teen. Just keep giong he really want you there.

[chellenout]

Sorry and 2nd agreement here!

Quoting 02nana07:

 Sorry if mine treated me disrespectful I would not be writing them a check,  I would tell them I wouldn't want to embarrass them by sending my money to the band. 

I understand not wanting your parents around but there is no excuse for disrespect at any age.

I know others might say let it slide but if you do it will only get worse.

[amberdy]

I don't let disrespect slide. My dd will be 14 in a few weeks and she doesn't like me being at school, but she knows she still has to show me respect. I don't expect hugs and kisses, but she will not be rude to me.

[bizzeemom2717]

My DD is in 8th grade and like most that age, not really happy about me being there but still knows she needs to show respect and not be rude. My older kids out grew most of this by high school.