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13 yr old dd threatens suicide when mad

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I could really use your help. Last night my 13 yr dd and I had a disagreement over TV and her report card. She's not supposed to watch TV on school nights. I have cable blocked on school nights - so now she tapes shows and watches them. Her report card came in the mail 2 nights ago. She has it and won't let me see it. After attempted discussions last night from which she just walked away, I told her she lost her phone/text for a week. Her immediate response - 'this is why I hate living here and want to kill myself.' - and then walked away.

I think she is bluffing, and is saying this to get a reaction. It has happened just once before. But of course I cannot be 100% certain. She has no other suicidal signs. Point to note: a school friend of hers died last year from the hanging game (choked herself).

Dd has been openly defiant to me in other ways. I don't like the direction I am seeing.

What do I do? Do I take her to counseling because 1) she might be suicidal, or 2) if she isn't, her suicidal threats are not approprirate. Or do I let this incident pass?

I tried to talk to her again last night and now she won't talk to me. I turned off her phone to follow through on my threat.



by on Mar. 22, 2012 at 9:05 AM
Replies (181-190):
by on Mar. 24, 2012 at 10:09 AM

My sister used to do this all the time it would make my mother scared to the point that she would just give in which only made things worse.  She finally she got her in to see someone so she could talk and after that it never happened again! She also had a hormone in balance that would make her just so hateful you just didnt want to be around her, they helped her deal with her body changes and mood swings.

by on Mar. 24, 2012 at 12:53 PM
1 mom liked this

Get her in to counseling...asap.

If she resists, you can take her to the hospital.  If she is truly suicidal, then they can help her.  If not, then she'll learn real fast what happens when you make threats like that. 

by on Mar. 24, 2012 at 12:54 PM

this is sad i thinnk yu shuld try twking to her again and dn never give up on her nn if tht dnt wrk give her conseling i really dnt kno wt to say im scared for yu

by on Mar. 24, 2012 at 2:52 PM
My daughter kept making threats like that and then she would say she didn't mean it. We called the suicide hotline and they said she is saying it to get our attention. They said she wasn't a threat cause if she meant it she would have done it by now and plus she doesn't cut herself. You could call the hotline and have them talk to her. I am currently having my daughter attend counseling as we have seen big behavior changes. 3 sessions into it and not sure its doing much. Maybe I chose the wrong counselor or just need to give it time.
by Bronze Member on Mar. 24, 2012 at 5:39 PM

Talk to her school counselor.  Let the counselor talk to her.  I think she is just trying to get a reaction out of you.  My son has emotional issues & he is only 9 & threatens this to me most of the time.  He just says it cuz he doesnt know how else to express himself.  Take allll tv away, take away the remote & her phone indefinitely until she can get her behavior in check.  Tell her that you will keep on sending her to counseling until she improves.  I know in todays society you cant watch your kids at all times, but find neighbors or friends who will watch her alll the time. 

by on Mar. 24, 2012 at 6:04 PM
Take her to shrink warn her about psychiatric hospital stays for suicide watch.
If she's bluffing the stay there will make her think twice about saying that eve again but if it's real she'll be there to get help.
by on Mar. 24, 2012 at 8:49 PM

My dd threatened suicide just once. I told her that she got one free pass and had just used it and the next time I would put her in a hospital for it. I don't play games with that shit and it's not a threat to throw around loosely.  She's never said it again. The thing is, I meant it. If she were to mention suicide she'd be packed and chcking into a psych ward that night.  I've known too many people who killed themselves to ignore potential signs or try to take care of things inhouse.

by on Mar. 25, 2012 at 1:29 AM
1 mom liked this

 If I were you I would go to school with her, sleep in her room, take her everywhere and she would never be left alone for a second and tell everyone "sorry my daughter decides that making suicide threats are ok so I have to accompany her everywhere she wants to go until her suicide watch is over."

by on Mar. 25, 2012 at 9:09 AM
1 mom liked this

Take her to the emergency room and let her get locked in the psych area for a little while. I doubt she'd threaten again.

by on Mar. 25, 2012 at 9:28 AM
Go to her school they will give u her report card. Take her to a counselor before is to late
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