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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

My daughter is 18 yrs old. Her boyfriend  and his friend moved in with us in February of this year, they would have been homeless otherwise. Her boyfriend confided in me this am that his feelings for her have changed and he wants to be friends with her like they were before they dated but he doesn't want to be her boyfriend anymore. He has no one else to live. I like him and his friend and don't want to kick them out. What do I do? My daughter comes first but this guy has been through a lot and we are close. He calls me mom. My daughter doesn't know whats coming, though I know she's not been happy with some of his behavior lately. Any suggestions what to do? These guys don't even have jobs yet.(they moved across state to live with us).

by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 8:14 PM
Replies (21-23):
cowboys49
by on Apr. 29, 2012 at 2:00 PM

You are trying to be more sympathetic to them than to what your daughter will have to deal with.  Children can steal your heart if you are a kind person.  But, you should set a time limit, let them know and do not have any more private conversations with the boys without your daughter being present.  Openly talk to everyone every time.  You will not only be fostering a much healthier relationship with your daughter but you will actually teach a lesson to the boys that in life honesty is the best policy and that they cannot try to steal you away from your daughter.  Stop this behavior ma'am.  You are the adult. 

hulbertzoo
by on May. 1, 2012 at 8:55 PM

Thanks for understanding. His dad ripped him off which is why hes in the position hes in. His mom and him parted ways when he wasn't even out of high school. He slept on a friends futon until he finished his senior year.  Its a very complicated situation, even my daughter doesn't want to kick him out. At this point, he really doesn't want to break up with her. He just thinks they need to take a little time, one, for him to get a job and get back on his feet, and two, for her to finish high school(she'll graduate in June).

bizzeemom2717
by Jen on May. 2, 2012 at 12:55 AM
I agree with pp that said geeze..be careful this has disaster/drama written all over it. Your DD is still young and in HS it's up to you to make the responsible decision on her behalf. Even if you look like the bad guy, I wouldn't care, because in asking them to move out and become responsible adults you are not only helping them, but most importantly being a good mom to your daughter....

Quoting hulbertzoo:

Thanks for understanding. His dad ripped him off which is why hes in the position hes in. His mom and him parted ways when he wasn't even out of high school. He slept on a friends futon until he finished his senior year.  Its a very complicated situation, even my daughter doesn't want to kick him out. At this point, he really doesn't want to break up with her. He just thinks they need to take a little time, one, for him to get a job and get back on his feet, and two, for her to finish high school(she'll graduate in June).

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