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DS (15) drank a bottle of wine (alone!?)

Posted by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:11 PM
  • 21 Replies

Yesterday DH and I were working in basement bathroom.  He filled up trash can with paper towels so I grabbed bag to take it out.  It felt heavier than it should for bathroom trash.   Further analysis revealed an empty wine bottle.  

Upon questioning, our DS, 15, revealed he had drank it - or at least part of it, alone.  He said he didn't like it, didn't vomit and didn't share it with his friends.  Not sure if I believe the last part.

Kudos to him for owning up to it.  DH and I shook our heads b/c we both knew that we had experimented with alcohol at that age, in the 80's, when you certainly didn't do it at home.  Not that that was a good thing but we understand the curiosity.

DH talked to him and told him that he understood but as he gets closer to driving, these things do not mix, you can mess up your life, etc, etc.

He is a good kid and rarely steps out of line. So, my question is:

a) Do we give him a pass with the talking to this first time while laying out consequences for repeat behavior?

b) Punish him in some way? Be specific?

by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:11 PM
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by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:13 PM
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Punish now and there may not be a later.

by Susie on Apr. 30, 2012 at 4:45 PM

Punish now.  If not he will think he can keep doing it.  I would give him some alcohol talks.  Also take away something like computer, phone, something for a week or 2. 

by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 4:49 PM
4 moms liked this

With him owning up to it, I think I would skip the punishment this time. I would have a nice in depth conversation with him about the results of drinking and complications it can cause. I would also lay out what the punishment will be if happens again.

by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 6:42 PM

 I would think up some sort of consequence, good luck.

by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 6:59 PM
1 mom liked this
I agree that there should be some sort of consequence.

I'd also be concerned about him possibly having shared alcohol with his friends, because of potential legal liability, for you and your husband, if say, one of his friends had gotten drunk from the wine, and had gone out and gotten hurt. I would make him aware of that.
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by on May. 1, 2012 at 9:27 AM
1 mom liked this

When my dd (15) was caught (she had done a couple shots of vodka at a friends house while the parents were in bed) and owned up to it, I had the alcohol talk with her and I still ended up grounding her.  We talked about why she was being grounded of course, but I stressed the importance of being able to trust her while she's with her friends and how important it is to make the right choices  even when everyone else is doing "it".  It seems to have been a good learning experience. 

by Grumpy on May. 1, 2012 at 9:51 AM
1 mom liked this

I would punish him but not severely.  He owned up to it and did it at home.  Explain to him that if he does it again the consequenses would be more severe.

by Bronze Member on May. 1, 2012 at 10:38 AM

Sounds fishy.  If he drank it alone or even a little of it at a time I wouldn't think he would have said he didn't like it. Why would you continue to drink it if you didn't like it?! Sounds more like her shared it with some buddies. Another issue would be who bought the wine?  Or was it a bottle of your wine you have in your house?  I agree with the poster who says you should talk to him about the ramifications of drinking in your home for him & or other since they are under age. Kind of hard to punish/consequence with out having the facts.  Good luck, this would be hard.

by Kimberly on May. 1, 2012 at 11:31 AM
2 moms liked this

I would have him write an essay on the effects of drinking at a young age....such as alcohol poisoning.  And the legal consequences.    It is a learning punishment :)

by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:28 PM

 I like the idea of essay writing. My teen hates this punishment, but she usually learns something, and we have more to talk about after reading.

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