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17 year old dd and online friends

Posted by on May. 14, 2012 at 9:43 AM
  • 26 Replies

My 17 year old dd wanted to drive 45 min away to meet with a 24 year old man she is friends with online.  I have seen his facebook pics and I know where he lives and works, but I told her no, I didn't think it was a good idea.  Of course, she is really mad and won't talk to me now.  She completely froze me out on Mothers Day.  Late last night, I shut down the internet and we had a huge fight.  I lost it and let my hurt feelings out and basically caller her out on her disrespectful attitude toward my husband and I.   Does anyone out there have a 17 going on 30 dd at home?   

by on May. 14, 2012 at 9:43 AM
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MB13
by on May. 14, 2012 at 1:55 PM
3 moms liked this

Stand your ground!  If he really is who he says he is, 24 is too old for 17. If it is really legit, and she wants to pursue a relationship, he should come to your house and meet you and your DH and DD in a safe environment.  On the other hand, if he won't come to meet you, he could be some kind of weird psycho predator!  Your daughter should not drive 45 minutes to meet him and take that risk.

rkoloms
by on May. 14, 2012 at 2:01 PM
1 mom liked this
Who knows if his online information is real? Your daughter wants to be stupid - DO NOT LET HER!!
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rkoloms
by on May. 14, 2012 at 2:02 PM
2 moms liked this
Have her invite him to your home. If he is who/what he says he is, he will agree


Quoting rkoloms:

Who knows if his online information is real? Your daughter wants to be stupid - DO NOT LET HER!!

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drfink
by Emily on May. 14, 2012 at 2:24 PM


Quoting MB13:

Stand your ground!  If he really is who he says he is, 24 is too old for 17. If it is really legit, and she wants to pursue a relationship, he should come to your house and meet you and your DH and DD in a safe environment.  On the other hand, if he won't come to meet you, he could be some kind of weird psycho predator!  Your daughter should not drive 45 minutes to meet him and take that risk.

Great advice !

atlmom2
by Susie on May. 14, 2012 at 2:41 PM
1 mom liked this

Oh, hell no. She shouldn't be chatting with a 24 year old she doesn't know anyway.  This person could be a 40 year old for all she knows.  No underage dd in my home would have anything to do with any adults online they don't know. 

annie2244
by Silver Member on May. 14, 2012 at 3:29 PM
1 mom liked this

I agree with atlmom.

Your kid needs to be convinced that meeting people online is really really dangerous, even when you are an adult. 

Your kid needs to be convinced that no normal adult is friending a minor online and asking them to meet them.

Your kid needs to be convinced that she doesn't meet anyone she doesn't have a solid person to person  relationship with, with references (people she knows know the guy) at a nonpublic place ever.

I'm less worried about this one wierdo who you have kiboshed in time (can you verb that word?), thankfully, but rather the fact that she is almost an adult and doesn't have some pretty important safety lessons solidly learned. Rectify this!

She's not going on 30 in my mind. That would imply some adult-sized common sense. I recommend shutting down her access to the internet (if that means you swap out her smart phone for a $15 dollar target cheap, do it) and no wifi. If she wants to use the internet for schoolwork, only supervised. She hasn't earned the right to that much freedom yet.

boys2men2soon
by Kimberly on May. 14, 2012 at 3:48 PM


Quoting MB13:

Stand your ground!  If he really is who he says he is, 24 is too old for 17. If it is really legit, and she wants to pursue a relationship, he should come to your house and meet you and your DH and DD in a safe environment.  On the other hand, if he won't come to meet you, he could be some kind of weird psycho predator!  Your daughter should not drive 45 minutes to meet him and take that risk.

This!  Furthermore, her childish behavior regarding freezing you out on Mother's Day just proves she is too immature to be involved with grown adults.




KeriAZ
by on May. 14, 2012 at 4:50 PM
My dd talks to alot of people online. She had an online relationship with him. Nothing inapropriate cause he thought she was a he. Lasted a little over a yr. She broke up with him cause she found out he was into beastiality. And that he thinks hes a shark. LOL. A vegitarian shark. She has asked me to visit her online friends and i said no. U dont know if hes who he says he is.
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mumsy2three
by Shauna on May. 14, 2012 at 5:31 PM


Quoting boys2men2soon:


Quoting MB13:

Stand your ground!  If he really is who he says he is, 24 is too old for 17. If it is really legit, and she wants to pursue a relationship, he should come to your house and meet you and your DH and DD in a safe environment.  On the other hand, if he won't come to meet you, he could be some kind of weird psycho predator!  Your daughter should not drive 45 minutes to meet him and take that risk.

This!  Furthermore, her childish behavior regarding freezing you out on Mother's Day just proves she is too immature to be involved with grown adults.

Completely agree~

missvickey
by on May. 14, 2012 at 5:40 PM
Dateline run shows on how they catch internet preditors. They are rarely what/who they say they are. Maybe you can have her watch some of those programs. Also have her talk to the local police about the dangers. Maybe they'll tell her about some cases they've had and how they all turn bad and all most never have a good ending.
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