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Re-wrote previous post: Would you let your daughter go to this sleep over?

Posted by on Aug. 9, 2012 at 12:39 AM
  • 26 Replies
Sorry for the confusion with the previous post. English is my second language, so I used google translate. That didnt work, so I asked a friend.

This is what I meant to post:

My 15 year old daughter wants to go to a sleep over in a week (not tomorrow). There will be four people there. My daughter, a friend and her brother, and the host girl. The boy is coming because he is a friend. I can tell that they both have crushes on each other (not bad history, google messed that up). I dont know if they are dating or anything about their relationship together. I am not sure if the boy will be sleeping near my daughter or not. They are all the same age.

My daughter has never been to a sleep over with a boy she likes, so I dont know if I can trust her or not.


If this still confuses you, ask the question in the simplest manner, so I understand better.
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by on Aug. 9, 2012 at 12:39 AM
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Replies (1-10):
DarlaHood
by on Aug. 9, 2012 at 1:23 AM
4 moms liked this

I do not think it is a matter of trust.  In my personal opinion, this just would not be a prudent thing to do.  Your daughter and the boy are probably good kids, and they are probably normal.  And sometimes things happen between normal kids because attraction and sex are normal too.

At 15, there should not be a boy at the sleepover (at least not one that is heterosexual)

drfink
by Emily on Aug. 9, 2012 at 1:58 AM


Quoting DarlaHood:

I do not think it is a matter of trust.  In my personal opinion, this just would not be a prudent thing to do.  Your daughter and the boy are probably good kids, and they are probably normal.  And sometimes things happen between normal kids because attraction and sex are normal too.

At 15, there should not be a boy at the sleepover (at least not one that is heterosexual)

Exactly

bizzeemom2717
by Jen on Aug. 9, 2012 at 2:01 AM
Well said, I agree.

Quoting DarlaHood:

I do not think it is a matter of trust.  In my personal opinion, this just would not be a prudent thing to do.  Your daughter and the boy are probably good kids, and they are probably normal.  And sometimes things happen between normal kids because attraction and sex are normal too.

At 15, there should not be a boy at the sleepover (at least not one that is heterosexual)

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fammatthews4
by Trisha on Aug. 9, 2012 at 5:14 AM
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No I would not allow it
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lakerfan420
by Jamie on Aug. 9, 2012 at 5:17 AM
I say it depends on supervision. My oldest dd's boyfriend has spent the night at our house before and even went camping with us last month for a week. Separate rooms/tents and there were no issues.
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annie2244
by Silver Member on Aug. 9, 2012 at 8:00 AM

Ditto! No coed sleepovers.  The opposite sex needs to go home at 11p or midnight, and there's needs to be assured adult supervision throughout.

Although I did allow my 16 y/o DD and her good girlfriend to come up to the lakehouse for an overnight with the best friend of the girlfriend, who is a guy, who I know pretty well, a very sweet shy kinda nerdy guy, after assuring myself that there was absolutely no romantic interest in either girl towards this guy ('ew, god, no mom, are you kidding?' was the satisfying response I got to the question). But I answered a firm 'no' to the question of whether my 16 y/o's boyfriend could come up and stay overnight. Not that I think he necessarily would try anything at that time, but it's just not a good precedent to set. Nope, boys can camp out at the campground down the road or drive the hour back to the city in the evening. 

Quoting bizzeemom2717:

Well said, I agree.

Quoting DarlaHood:

I do not think it is a matter of trust.  In my personal opinion, this just would not be a prudent thing to do.  Your daughter and the boy are probably good kids, and they are probably normal.  And sometimes things happen between normal kids because attraction and sex are normal too.

At 15, there should not be a boy at the sleepover (at least not one that is heterosexual)


mumsy2three
by Shauna on Aug. 9, 2012 at 8:14 AM

I think it depends on the supervision.

My dd had co ed sleepovers at our house when she was in middle school. Boys slept downstairs, girls slept in her room. There was no trying to sneak into the room where the opposite sex was. My husband works nights and is up all night long when he is off, so adult supervision was constant.

2KoolMama
by on Aug. 9, 2012 at 9:24 AM

I have mixed feelings.   I would not allow my 15 year old to go to a sleep over if there were going to be male friends staying there.   I'm impressed that your 16 year old even informed you of that :).    On the other hand I have a 15 year old girl and a 17 year old boy.  They are only 1 grade apart in school and have many of the same friends.   Eiether one of them will have friends stay the night and they all hang out together but then go to seperate bedrooms and sleep.   At my house I don't have an issue with it.  But I wouldn't feel comfortable with it at someone elses house.

atlmom2
by Susie on Aug. 9, 2012 at 9:28 AM
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No coed sleepovers with guys my dd likes. I did allow one at homecoming with no guys dd liked. Wasn't thrilled but she went.
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momto3infl
by Bronze Member on Aug. 9, 2012 at 10:38 AM
Since other girls and parents there yes I would allow.
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