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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

I am not sure HELP

Posted by on Nov. 16, 2012 at 8:32 PM
  • 10 Replies

My child is 14 she has had a lot of problems with misbehaving, cutting, talking about killing herself. then this past summer she said she was molested by a family friend. I had questioned her on this subject because of some things that she had written. she told her boyfriend what had happened to her and when I ask her one evening she said that if i really wanted to know I should ask him, I did. she has come forward and talked to the police about this but so far nothing has been done. now when she does not get her way she seems to use it, to try to get her way. I do not give in and it makes me wonder if it is made up. Everyone tells me never to let her think that i do not beleive her, let her know that i will believe her no matter what. I have talked to her about what is going to happen to this person and that it is going to make his life a living hell. Not sure what to do most of the time because of things that she says i do believe her, but at times when she uses it to try and get her way i am not so sure. HELP!

by on Nov. 16, 2012 at 8:32 PM
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Replies (1-10):
SRUsarahSC
by on Nov. 16, 2012 at 9:56 PM

you did the right thing by believing her, what if you hadn't and you were wrong?   If she's lying she will cave and tell the truth. DO NOT let her use this against you to get her way. You are not at fault.

gravercem
by on Nov. 16, 2012 at 9:57 PM

 Sounds like you need to get her help asap, its a lot for any person to deal with.  I hope you can find someone she is willing to talk to that can help her and your family. 

bizzeemom2717
by on Nov. 17, 2012 at 2:07 AM
Why do you think she's lying? Not something most people would lie about and IF she is, or thinking about it, just because you have suspicions and what you've been through I really really hope she is getting some sort if counseling and you can get a professionals point of view on what you should do. You are correct this is someone's life , 2 people's actually (your dd's and the man she's accusing) get some help
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fantasticfour
by Grumpy on Nov. 17, 2012 at 9:16 AM

You can believe her and not let her use it as an excuse for her behavior.  Time for counseling and some good old fashioned tough love.

lucky2Beeme
by Gold Member on Nov. 17, 2012 at 11:44 AM

Why havent you taken her to the police ? This needs action. If she was molested she needs help as in therapy.

annie2244
by Silver Member on Nov. 17, 2012 at 11:58 AM

You can believe her. And you can not let her get away with stuff. These are not mutually exclusive. It's a choice to let her manipulate you by her using this.

atlmom2
by Susie on Nov. 17, 2012 at 12:15 PM
This


Quoting annie2244:

You can believe her. And you can not let her get away with stuff. These are not mutually exclusive. It's a choice to let her manipulate you by her using this.


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KeriAZ
by on Nov. 17, 2012 at 12:43 PM
Look. My dd was doing the cutting thing too. Found out that my ex her father molested her from 5 to 12. She wanted to kill herself as well. My ex is in prison for 5yrs, pay $450,000 to the state,register as a sex offender and lifetime probation. I think u need to press the issue with the cops. U need to talk to a detetive in the sex crime unit. Get ur dd into therapy. My dd has been for 2yrs now and i went to my own. Good luck.
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19renee62
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:41 PM

we have gone to the police! as stated in my first post, and she has been in therapy for 3 years now. we also go to a childrens behavior clinic which is suppose to have some of the best dr. available.

robyann
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:47 PM

 Just because she uses this to get her way, doesn't mean it didn't really happen. She has just found a way to make you feel bad for her. I'd say to continue to believe her, but don't let her get away with anything she wouldn't normally get by with.

typingMom to 6~MawMaw to 9 & counting!

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