See what CafeMoms are saying about saving time this holiday season..
Now that we have had some time to think this through and have some perspective, we have decided that this bump in the road might just be necessary for our son to grow up. A dose of reality in his life which has been smooth sailing and easy up till now. This learning experience will help him later in life.
We will bring him home next weekend. He will have to get a job, pay rent and expenses. We decided not to make him pay back the school he failed. Rather he will have to save up to pay to retake the classes at a local community college. If he can get back on track in the next year, we will consider sending him back to University, if that is what he chooses to do.
Engineering is his passion. I know he will be motivated to get back to college at some point. I think he just has some growing up to do.
Thanks everyone for your input and advice.
As if dealing with my 16 year old ds's issues wasn't enough, now I am having trouble with my 18 year old. Trouble of a different sort.
I posted earlier this week about my son not responding to my attempts to contact him at collge.
My son goes to a reputable university with a very competitive engineering program. This year was the toughest to get in, or so the college says. My son was a straight A student in high school. Self motivated to get his work done. Involved in the marching band, he loves music. I worried about him going off to college because he is very much an introvert, but at the same time thought the experience would be good for him.
We knew at about mid semester he was having some trouble managing his time. He was spending too much time playing games on his computer and not enough time studying. So we sat down and talked with him about some solutions that would help him manage his time better. For a while he seemed to be doing well. Then we started hearing from him less. At this point it is too late to withdraw from classes. I started asking him in early November if he had registered for next sememster yet. He kept stringing me along telling me he was going to. All along telling us everything is fine. He is a little worried about calculus but he is going to study hard for finals.
Yesterday I logged on to what little parent information we are allowed to see (dumb privacy rules, we are paying the Bill, we should be able to see more...rant) anyway I and I see he has failed 2 classes already. I wouldn't be surprised if he has failed the others, but he hasn't taken all of his final exams yet. I am devistated. I can't believe he would let things get this bad and not tell us anything. We will have to pay back the financial aid he was given by the school. Looks like when he comes home for Christmas it will be for good. He will have to get a job and make up the classes that he failed and maybe he can apply for readmission next spring and pick up where he left off.
We can't talk to him about this though, because he is completely ignoring our calls, texts and emails. Ugggggg. What do I do? This is a hard lesson for him, maybe one he needed. But a huge financial burden for us right before Christmas. I am so mad! Now I need to call the school today and find out what we need to do. He needs to let housing know he isn't coming back in the spring and who knows what else.
I swear when it rains it pours!!! At least my 16 has woken up and decided that doing his homework IS in his best interest.