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I am officially disowning my sister

Posted by on Jan. 10, 2013 at 6:21 PM
Ida
  • 41 Replies

She has done so much through the years but tonight was the last straw I hope she enjoys her life and can live with the choices she has made throughout her life that got her to where she is today. 

I am happy with where I am and have chosen to remove myself from the negativety she brings into my life I will be doing one last thing before it will be over and I never see her again.

I have been there for her when she needed me but she has never been there for me and I don't need anyone blood or not that is only out for what they can get from you.

I have so many good friends that are more like a sister than she has ever been so I am fine with my decision.

by on Jan. 10, 2013 at 6:21 PM
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Replies (1-10):
annie2244
by Silver Member on Jan. 10, 2013 at 6:38 PM
1 mom liked this

Such drama!

Relatives aren't chosen like friends are. They often don't up to the standards we have for our friends, who we chose. Get over it.

Relatives also aren't disposable.  Just b/c they aren't as delightful or responsible as you would like doesn't mean they get tossed aside.

My advice (which I understand you're not asking for, it seems your venting is actually a passive request for validation of  tantrum and pettiness) is:

Control your relatives access to your life without cutting them off. It's not all or nothing.

Lower your expectations. They don't owe you good behavior. They are who they are.

Respond positively and don't get sucked into their drama. You don't have to be victimized by them to have a relationship with them.

 

tyfry7496
by on Jan. 10, 2013 at 7:02 PM
3 moms liked this
I'm with you. I have cut family members out of my life because of their need to try and control mine. Just because someone is family doesn't mean you have to have them in your life. Do what you have to do to keep peace in your life.
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02nana07
by Ida on Jan. 10, 2013 at 8:36 PM
1 mom liked this

 You would feel different if you knew what she did and blood means nothing if the person is so cold.  It is not something I can get over and relatives aren't allowed to treat you the way my sister treated me  just because we are related.  I don't need validation, people who know us can't believe it took me so long. 

Quoting annie2244:

Such drama!

Relatives aren't chosen like friends are. They often don't up to the standards we have for our friends, who we chose. Get over it.

Relatives also aren't disposable.  Just b/c they aren't as delightful or responsible as you would like doesn't mean they get tossed aside.

My advice (which I understand you're not asking for, it seems your venting is actually a passive request for validation of  tantrum and pettiness) is:

Control your relatives access to your life without cutting them off. It's not all or nothing.

Lower your expectations. They don't owe you good behavior. They are who they are.

Respond positively and don't get sucked into their drama. You don't have to be victimized by them to have a relationship with them.

 

 

02nana07
by Ida on Jan. 10, 2013 at 8:41 PM
2 moms liked this

 THANKS I am making my decision because I deserve better and she isn't worth the stress she causes.

Quoting tyfry7496:

I'm with you. I have cut family members out of my life because of their need to try and control mine. Just because someone is family doesn't mean you have to have them in your life. Do what you have to do to keep peace in your life.

 

Mommyagain39
by on Jan. 10, 2013 at 10:32 PM
1 mom liked this

a lot of people are prob going to tell you that you will regret it, I am not. you can't choose your family, but you can choose who you have as an active member in your life. relation by blood does not guarantee a person a spot in my life either. there . are too many good people in the world to settle for a birthdays because you h a open to share the same parents.good for you!!!!

boys2men2soon
by Kimberly on Jan. 10, 2013 at 11:02 PM
1 mom liked this

Surround yourself with people who add to your life, not subtract from it.     I understand,  I cut ties with one of my sisters for my own self preservation (and that of my children).    I wish her health, happiness and peace of mind.......but not at the risk of my own.




ARPsMom
by on Jan. 10, 2013 at 11:04 PM
I cut my brother and his crazy wife out of my life last year. My stress level has dropped a ton.
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ashleighmama
by Ashleigh on Jan. 11, 2013 at 12:15 AM
I'm sorry you're having to deal with this, but hooray for you for standing up for yourself and not putting up with her b.s. anymore. Hugs mama!
Ashleigh
02nana07
by Ida on Jan. 11, 2013 at 9:47 AM

 So true and we only shared one parent which is no longer here so I no longer feel obligated

Quoting Mommyagain39:

a lot of people are prob going to tell you that you will regret it, I am not. you can't choose your family, but you can choose who you have as an active member in your life. relation by blood does not guarantee a person a spot in my life either. there . are too many good people in the world to settle for a birthdays because you h a open to share the same parents.good for you!!!!

 

02nana07
by Ida on Jan. 11, 2013 at 10:35 AM
1 mom liked this

 I feel the same and I have friends that I would do anything for and they would do the same for me.  My sister is only around to cause drama or try to hurt me.

Quoting boys2men2soon:

Surround yourself with people who add to your life, not subtract from it.     I understand,  I cut ties with one of my sisters for my own self preservation (and that of my children).    I wish her health, happiness and peace of mind.......but not at the risk of my own.

 

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