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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

An older Mom's viewpoint...

Posted by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 7:43 AM
  • 28 Replies

I've always said God only gives girls to the mom who can handle them. I had two boys. They are now 33 and 35, ones a high school teacher and the other is a chef. From what I hear on here, I just have one question. These girls are throwing their childhood away with both hands...why would they want to do that?? I'm glad I never had a girl because I couldn't handle what you moms are handling on a daily basis. I applaud you all because it damn sure is a tough business. The boy next door tells me what the girls in his school are doing and I'm speechless. Rarely, if ever, am I speechless. My friend in Alabama tells me they are giving blow jobs on the school busses. I'm now 63 and I guess our parents were thinking the same thing that I'm thinking now. Good luck, Ladies.

by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 7:43 AM
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Replies (1-10):
atlmom2
by Susie on Jan. 17, 2013 at 8:19 AM
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Not all girls do these things. If the boys weren't asking for them the girls wouldn't be giving them.
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arango
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 8:23 AM
1 mom liked this
Well my dd is 19 and i am 35 . She has a 18mth son. She's my only child. Yes it's been tough at times but that's life. She's still in School never quit it. She has a side job. A good bf. She trully puts effort into been part of a positive productive society. im proud of having a female a beautiful young lady. I thank my Glorious Lord for blessing me with a girl.
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ForeverLawst
by Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 8:27 AM
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It's scary out there. My DD (13) has a good friend who stays at our house after youth group every Wednseday night until her grandparents pick her up around 10pm. She's really cute, skinny, smart and has such horible self-esteem. My DH sent me links to the pages she was looking at on our network, all depressive, suicidal, cutting, I'm not good enough, pretty enough. pictures of her sucking face with her bf (at 13 =/ ) etc. I was heart broken when I looked at all that. I asked her last night why she lives with her gparents and she told me her dad was in jail because of drugs and her mom was transient, no home, no job.. She's living with her overly strict Gparents for stability. I've decided to take her under my wing because I was exactly where she is now 30 years ago. I survived it and came out the other side a better person. She needs an adult she can talk to who won't judge her or the situation. It just makes me sad.

zacmacsmomm
by Bronze Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 8:32 AM

My son is 19 and daughter is 13.  My son has told me about some of the girls he went to school with.  Crazy stuff.  My 13 year old daughter is still fairly easy.  I have a very open-line of communication with her and when she notices something at school that is "off" we talk about it.  She starts high school next year, so I hope she decides to stay as open with me as she is now. 

02nana07
by Ida on Jan. 17, 2013 at 8:52 AM

 I have seen boys that have been a handful as well as girls it depends on the child not the sex of the child. 

It also has to do with how they are raised you have to start young you can't wait until they become a teen then start to parent.

I know some that when their kids were little and would cuss and talk back to the parent they thought it was cute and would laugh but as they became teens it wasn't so funny.

Some kids are just gonna be bad no matter what you do but you still have to do your best and stand strong always reminding them you are the parent.

sunflowers12
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 10:13 AM

 well, if that's what she is really doing she obviously was given to the wrong momma!!!  i have three dds and none of them have ever done this type of activity ... not at this age i have one that 21 in a long time relationship of about five years.. my 18 year old is in Florida with her long time bf as well and my youngest is just 13 and to young for any of that stuff thankfully.. there are moms that are great and have been doing as much as they can, and the girl goes hormonally nuts and become promiscuous sometimes having a false sense of security because she is on the pill, so she does some very risky behaviors for whatever reason... but not every girl is this way... yes there may be a lot but to generalize is really not fair to those who have respect for them selves...  those who to stay away from risky behaviors such as the one you spoke of... girls do mature a great deal faster then boys no doubt about that, and do want to do thing faster the the male counter parts and have the tenacity to make the things happen that they really want sometimes good/bad... i can only really speak for my dds and although they have never been angles they also haven't been acting as this girl you mentioned...  now they are young adults and my oldest is so goal oriented it amazing she just has a drive that will only bring success in my eyes... my 18 year old still a little on an unsure path but hopeing she comes around ... my youngest to you right now, but she is doing well in school has fun skating and hang-in with friends kid stuff:) that suits me fine:) i do know from friends that only have boys the don't understand and almost seem afraid of girls vs boys but that's only because that's all they have experienced... but i can also tell a difference in how they deal with daughter in laws and stuff later on not all, but a lot of women that have no dds but ds have a harder time it seems with the dd laws... but that' s just an observation i have noticed...shrugging

sabrtooth1
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 12:18 PM
1 mom liked this

These girls are not doing these things because boys talked them into it, or because they are horrible kids.  They are doing it because their parents are throwing them at boys with both hands, beginning at a Godawful young age.  I see that a lot of the posters on these boards are young mothers with no education, no jobs, and no ambition.  A lot of THEIR mothers, and grandmothers are the same.  And, as someone pointed out to me, when I mentioned the fact that the US has the HIGHEST rate of teen pregnancies in the civilized world, many of these girls CHOSE to get pregnant.  Because that is what they have been taught.  They are TAUGHT that they must attract a man.  They are TAUGHT that their only power is thru sex.  They are TAUGHT to value their vaginas more than their brains.  And it's a sin. 

I'm 60 -- also an older mother.  I have 2 daughters, 29 & 31.  The younger is the Exec Assistant to the president of a trucking firm.  The older is a HS teacher.  They did NOT have one-on-one boyfriends, much less steadies, until they were out of HS.  That is because they were too busy with schoolwork, preparing for college, doing volunteer work, doing extra-curriculars, CHORES, and jobs.  The vast majority of their friends were the same, as were their parents.  Of ALL their friends, only ONE is a SAHM--but she did not marry till she was 25, to a guy a few years older, who is a police detective, and she had kids right away.  She has a college degree, and will undoubtedly go back to work when the kids start school.  It's all in how they were raised. 

Momtimestwo
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 12:26 PM
Your second sentence isn't completely accurate. Sex and the assumed 'popularity' it comes with is EVERYWHERE. It is all over the media and basically every time you turn around. Sex sells. The girls see that. They want the attention. It is more about self esteem than the boys asking for it. Girls can be just as bad, if not worse, as boys these days. I see it every day.

BTW, I'm the mom of an almost 14 year old boy and an almost 13 year old girl.


Quoting atlmom2:

Not all girls do these things. If the boys weren't asking for them the girls wouldn't be giving them.
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bizzeemom2717
by Jen on Jan. 17, 2013 at 12:30 PM
1 mom liked this
I'm the mom of a boy age 20 and a girl age 15. Not all girls act that way, the ones with parents who pay attention do not like mine. Just like not all boys act like polite young gentleman only the ones with parents who pay attention. There are PLENTY of posts of boys on here out of control sexually not just girls, you either missed, skipped or left our those entirely.
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fantasticfour
by Grumpy on Jan. 17, 2013 at 12:31 PM

Exactly. My girls don't do that and I hope they never will.  The boys aren't innocent in the matter, it does take two.

Quoting atlmom2:

Not all girls do these things. If the boys weren't asking for them the girls wouldn't be giving them.


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