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My 14 DD just asked if she could go out on a date

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Over the summer she went to vocational school for a week, and she said one of the boys from her class asked her to go on a double date with his older brother and his girlfriend.  I don't even know this kid!  I don't know his parents and I especially don't like the idea of an older brother being a shaperone!  How do I make her understand that this is not going to happen?  I know her and she is going to harp on it and drive me crazy.  I told her have the boy come here, I don't know him, and frankly I don't trust anyone with my daughter unless I know him and the parents.

by on Jan. 22, 2013 at 11:19 AM
Replies (11-20):
Melissa_4
by on Jan. 22, 2013 at 6:55 PM

We tease our kids and tell them that they are not allowed to date until they turn 18.  Our oldest son is 15, and girls are not even on his radar yet.

Our 12 year old has told us how she's heard about some girls in her class already messing around with boys and having sex.  She thinks it's repulsive, I agree with her and have told her about how girls like that will wind up with bad reputations (among other issues).  

To bottom line it, I'd have to say no way.

mumsy2three
by Shauna on Jan. 22, 2013 at 7:17 PM

You have already given her your answer and an alternative option, having him over.

Our dd wasn't allowed to go on one to one dates at that age but she was allowed to go in groups, most were chaperoned by at least one parent of a participant in the group. My husband and I still had to meet the boy she was "going" with before she was allowed to go.

mango44
by on Jan. 23, 2013 at 5:14 PM
1 mom liked this

Well my daughter has finally gotten the message after 2 days of sulking!  She said she still doesn't get why, and I said ya don't have to get it.  I won't allow it and that's that!  Have him over here, I don't know him and I will not allow you to go out with him period. 

fammatthews4
by Trisha on Jan. 23, 2013 at 5:36 PM

Good for you for sticking to your convictions.  

Quoting mango44:

Well my daughter has finally gotten the message after 2 days of sulking!  She said she still doesn't get why, and I said ya don't have to get it.  I won't allow it and that's that!  Have him over here, I don't know him and I will not allow you to go out with him period. 


Barabell
by Barbara on Jan. 23, 2013 at 5:36 PM

You're doing the right thing. I'm glad you're sticking to what you said you'd allow!!

Quoting mango44:

Well my daughter has finally gotten the message after 2 days of sulking!  She said she still doesn't get why, and I said ya don't have to get it.  I won't allow it and that's that!  Have him over here, I don't know him and I will not allow you to go out with him period. 


momto3infl
by Bronze Member on Jan. 23, 2013 at 6:04 PM

 Sounds good.  I would want to at least the boy and brother and talk with parents.  I dont have too much I worry on double date type dates and depending on where would probably let them as long as I met the boy.

woodswalker
by Member on Jan. 23, 2013 at 7:04 PM

I wouldnt let her.  If she really wants to see the kid, supervised get-together at your house.

rachel499
by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 11:58 AM

I agree with you.

tnmommy5
by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 12:46 PM

 My dd knows that she can't date until at least 16.

gonecrazi
by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 12:53 PM

 Stand your ground with her. She is still a little young to date  on her own.

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