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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

trying to hang in there (vent)

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So my FS have been cut and now I have to figure out how to budget so there will be enough to eat. I probably will just cut out a lot of meat or all of it since it is so expensive. I tell my 13 y/o not to eat everything up when it comes to what we do have. But being the selfish, spiteful a** he is, he does it anyway. When I b**ch about he acts like he doesnt hear me or looks at me with a blank look. Whatever. Anyway, now that I have recovered from being sick, I am desperately looking for a job. I walk to the library almost everyday and fill out numerous applications but nothing yet. Of course, bills are steadily piling up. I applied for assistance with gas and electric bill but I may not get any help. Sigh. Does anybody have any words of encouragement? I feel like just saying the hell with it and giving up some days. I never thought my life will be like this. I use to have things together. Oh well. what are you going to do? Life is so unpredictable..
by on Feb. 3, 2013 at 10:59 AM
Replies (21-24):
Barabell
by Barbara on Feb. 4, 2013 at 10:06 AM

In addition to church pantries, look to see if there are food shelves nearby. Also, just because you don't qualify for FS anymore, maybe through your county you might qualify for heating assistance or another program. Here, it is easier to qualify for free and reduced price school lunches than FS too.

the3Rs
by Member on Feb. 4, 2013 at 10:09 AM

Nice story.  Again, I won't ever be in a situation like that, but thanks anyway.  As for the "finger pointing" - I'm not saying anything about her financial issues - only that she is immensely rude and disrespectful to her son - and if he IS disrespecting her...I can see where he gets it from.  As I know that I have never and would never talk about or treat my children in that manner, I'm not worried about '3 fingers pointing back'. 

Quoting jazzgirl205:

3Rs,

We were in that situation and it had nothing to do with finances.  We were snowed in up in the mtns for almost a week with only 2 days worth of food  (it was a vacation house so there were no staples in the pantry).  I had to tell dd that she could not snack or fix herself anyfood.  She was only to eat at mealtimes.  Thank God that I had milk, bacon, flour, and butter.  I didn't even clean the grease in the skillet.  I just saved it for gravy for the next meal.  We had a lot of biscuits and thin gravy.  I even stretched the canned vegetables by "creaming" them with flour, milk and grease.

My Mexican grandmother used to say, "Whenever you point your finger at someone else, there are 3 fingers pointing at you."

Quoting the3Rs:

Well - no. I won't be in that situation, though the fact that you're wishing that on anyone is pretty telling about the kind of person YOU are. I feel sorry for your son having a mom talk about him like that. If you have NOTHING else in the world, you have FAMILY - that's the one thing you should cherish not chastise.

Quoting queensweet:

Quoting the3Rs:

Sorry but I can't get past you calling your son a selfish, spiteful ass because he eats your food. OMG. My 13 year old eats us out of house & home (yet is skinny as a rail) - he's a growing teenage boy. They eat a lot! Sheesh.

yes they do eat a lot. But there is a big difference between being hungry and eating ALL of the main courses so no one else cant have any which is being spiteful! You dont the sh** I go through. So with that said why dont you keep your narrowminded, judgmental comments to yourself! one day you are going to be in my shoes and will no what it feels like. I hope it happens to you soon!




mamabear0791
by on Feb. 4, 2013 at 12:30 PM

Can you work with a job coach? Through the FS office, they will sometimes set up a meeting to assist those who are going off PA. The job coach will help redefine your resume, write cover letters, and even hlep with interview practice. When I was first trying to get a job after graduating from college, the job coach here helped me so much! It had been 10 years since my health allowed me to work. Everything, including the resume format had changed! 

Sometimes jobs fall in your lap, but more often than not, it'll take some time! You got this! 

I'll keep you in my thoughts!

queensweet
by on Feb. 4, 2013 at 9:39 PM
Quoting Ewa101:

So sorry you are going through such tough times.There are many suggestions here to help you with getting food on the table (food banks, church). How about your mother in law. Can she help? Can your son go there once in a while to have dinner? Can both of you?

I am a little concerned about your relationship with your son. Yes, he should be more considerate, and not eat the last morsel in the house. But he is only thirteen! I sense there is a lot of anger there, maybe on both sides. Why all the anger? It's not your fault that times are tough, but it's not his either. Can he help financially? Have a talk with him, maybe a good cry. Things must get better between the two of you. Tough times will pass, your relationship with your child is more important.


with all due respect, I have a right to be angry because, as I stated in other replies, I have disccussed the circumstances PLENTY of times with my child. And he does not care because he would still eat up a lot of the food especially main courses and there would not be much if any left for me to eat. I am a human being whom by the way is struggling with health issues and still need to have my nutrition as well. I dont care who it is. If they are not being considerate of others in there household, then it needs to be addressed right then and there. If he does not start respecting his mom and the rules of the household, then he is going to have a rude awakening when he gets out in the real world. If you think I am angry, then maybe you need to get out there in the real world and see how people "deal" with those whom are disrespectful and inconsiderate.
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